A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:my fiancee cheated on me with my sister in law at a family party in september, i only just found out by accident when i saw a text she sent him at the time. i took him back because we have 2 year old daughter, but i cant stand him touching me and when he tried to get me in the mood at the weekend i cried a headache and a fight started and he threw it in my face that if i wasnt so bad in bed he wouldnt of gone elsewhere. my friends at work keep telling me to leave him but we have a daughter together and i dont knowM what to do! Please help someone
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at work, cheated on me, fiance, in the mood, sister in law, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, girlwhoneedshelp  +, writes (6 December 2007):
 Are you completely insane? LEAVE HIM. You do have a child that is biologically his but it doesn't mean its YOURS(as in both). W
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2007): For goodness sake! He had an affair with your sis-in-law!
It's family! He even messed with people that you are suppose to trust.
For your kid, leave him! It doesn't not make sense to have a father like him. He will do more harm than good. If you continue to be so unhappy, your daughter will feel it someday. The relationship that you and your husband have is a model for your kid. I'm sure this is not what you want for her.
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A
female
reader, missmel34  +, writes (6 December 2007):
 What TasteofInia and Collaroy just said...I totally agree with.
I have 3 daughters. I asked by husband to leave, he was a cheater. The final thing that made me end it was one simple question.
Would you like your daughter living your life? Would you want her married to a man like this, to be disrespected, dishonoured, abused??
If you can't answer yes to this question, then why are you allowing it for yourself.
The best thing you as a mother can do for your daughter is live your life as an example to her. Have self respect, honour yourself, be a strong confident woman, don't accept second best. This is the greatest gift we can give our daughters. They don't learn these things by watching their mothers waste their life in a loveless marriage. Our daughters learn everything about men and relationships by watching us, they are sponges. Whether you realise it or not, the decisions you are making are shaping her destiny.
Be strong, for yourself but also for your daughter, you both deserve better
Good Luck
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A
male
reader, Collaroy +, writes (6 December 2007):
 It's a terrible thing to have to say to someone they should leave their partner especially when a child is involved.
But what is the alternative for you, you have a partner who has no respect for you, he is unfaithful, he is cruel and unkind.
You have to organise your life secure your future and dump this arsehole.
Does your sister in laws husband ( your brother? ) know about this? Maybe you shouldnt be suffering this betrayal alone.
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (6 December 2007):
 Leave him. Don't just stay because of your daughter. Do you really want your daughter growing up with this man? You are leaving him for a good reason. He is a cheater, he is cruel, he is nasty, he is no good for you and your daughter. I agree with your friends - leave the bastard. How dare he cheat on you with your sister-in-law! I hope her husband knows.
Ditch him. Find a man who can truly support you and your daughter.
xx India
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