A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hey,Here's my story. Been with my bf for 2 years now. I'm very much in love with him. He has a lot of issues that I've tried to over look and tried to help with. Trust,control, and gambling. He has no reason to not trust me, as I've been loyal. He needs access to everything I do online. Fb, email accounts. He gambles excessively. He makes good money but has nothing to show for it. Gambles everything away. I moved out 6 months ago. We lived together and he said he quit gambling which was a lie. He went away on business and spent 3500.00 in 3 days. Didn't pay rent. So I left him. We stayed together. Just don't live together anymore. He's continued his lifestyle after all his broken promises. Promised to quit gambling, promised to get help, promised to buy me a ring. Its been so many lies and I'm seeing that he won't get help. I've given him money huge mistake he spent it on gambling. He forged my cheque, used it to gamble. Buy him food, cigarettes, sometimes his blood pressure meds cause he gambles everything. I'm so tired of this. I've not given him anything recently nor will I. He's now complaining he has no money for a rental truck cause he gambled the money. He was evicted from his place due to gambling. He is now making me feel guilty I'm not budging this time. I've given more then I've kept in this relationship. He promised he will seek help and says he means it this time. That he wants us to move back in together. I'm so confused. :(
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female
reader, xanthic  +, writes (14 September 2010):
 Regardless of what he says, his life and well-being isn't your responsibilty, it's his. Until he realizes that, he's not going to change. He's going to say what he thinks you want to hear, remain dependent on you and continue doing what he likes. For the sake of you own sanity, let him go.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 September 2010): I have to agree with everyone that left comments here.
This guy doesn't trust you, controls you and gambles his money then uses u to bail him out. NOOO! Don't do it. Don't allow this person to make u feel guilty any longer. Why hasn't he got help? I will tell u why cause he doesn't want to that's why. If he was genuine he would have. U have allowed this for 2 years for him to mistreat u. Gambling is an addiction no doubt there. Lies come with the gambling no doubt there. They cover it up. Don't want anyone to know the true extent of what their doing. Yes mostly text book. I'm here to tell u it won't stop. Until u make it stop by moving on with your life. Maybe then he will get help or maybe not.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 September 2010): He is not going to change. This is more than obvious. Like someone else said, textbook behavior. The only way you will get him out of your life is to refuse contact. He has nothing to lose and everything to gain by persisting in this with you. For you on the other hand its the other way around. Cut off all contact with him immediately.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (14 September 2010):
No he won't quit. Not any day soon. He just wants a bed for the night, and is playing you yet again. This guy is a walking nightmare! He's broken all his promises to quit, he's lied to you repeatedly, forged your name illegally to commit fraud in your name.
Two words for him - TOUGH SHIT.
Stop being this guy's safety net, and live your own life. You give him a bed, he'll take your money, your clothes, your jewellery, your furniture and anything else he can find and sell it and gamble with the money he gets for it. You know it, everyone knows it. And he knows it most of all.
He's so bad, that he's making you feel guilty for not helping after all the crap he's put you through. And he's done nothing to stop his gambling, yet expects you to take him back.
Let him ROT.
Take the confusion away, and accept that this guy is only making you feel this way because he wants to get a bed for the night, and money from your house for they day.
He's not a charity case. He's a liar who doesn't' care about anyone else but himself. Don't be a doormat.
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