A
female
age
41-50,
*immeansers
writes:my boyfriend still stays the night at his ex wifes house when he goes to visit his son. i have been told by a nother girl that he still has sex with his ex wife when he goes to visit, and that they dont sleep separately. of course i asked him and he denies that it happens anymore, i think it is inappropriate that he stays the night at her house. my sister said i need to put my foot down on this matter. i get upset when he stays over there but not until after the fact, it bothers me alot because i know he is still in love with her and would do anything she told him to including sex. she is very controlling and he was very down on himself and overweight when they were together just like she wanted him to be. now he looks very fit and he is happy with me, i am good to him. im afraid she will sleep with him just to know she still controls him. what can i do? is it unreasonable to ask him not to sleep over? he can get a motel, but i think he will just lie to me. help!
View related questions:
ex-wife, his ex, overweight Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2014): Wow reading what you wrote bout him staying the night at his ex house I know how you feel ! The guy I been seen stays at his ex girlfriend also maybe once a week . It drives me crazy he is there as I write. I don't know what to do I thought I was the only one who would put up with it.. I talked with him bout it N he says they are not sleeping with one another.. it's hard I feel for you N I hope things work out for you . But I know I don't think I can do this much longer it hurts as I know you must also hurt. Let me know how it works out for you please?
A
female
reader, Yetilicious +, writes (5 April 2011):
 Him sleeping at his Ex's house is unaccaptable. If you believe he still loves her...why would you want to be with him anyway? Don't you want someone who can give you ALL of his love, not just part of it? I would tell him that he needs to make a decision. You are not comfortable with him staying at an Ex's house, and if he wants to keep you in his life he needs to change that, or your gone. I think if he really cared about you and wanted to make it work then he would respect your wishes.
...............................
A
female
reader, angelDlite  +, writes (5 April 2011):
 hi you are right to be concerned. there is no real need for him to stay at her house, you say that he still loves her, you have been told by someone (are they a reliable source?) that he is still sleeping with her. how many more clues do you need? i do not know ANY man who would sleep at the ex's house when they go to visit their child. can your boyfriend not have his son stay with him at all? xx
...............................
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (5 April 2011):
 Your sister is right, this is totally inappropriate. It sounds like he might be sleeping with her. Sleeping at his ex's house overnight is absolutely not OK, especially if he's still in love with her. Since he doesn't even see the problem, since you don't trust him as is, since you hear rumors about them having sex, and since he's being totally insensitive, it might be a good idea to reconsider the relationship.
...............................
A
male
reader, Capri2  +, writes (5 April 2011):
"is it unreasonable to ask him not to sleep over?"Well, it is funny you are asking this. Of course he can't sleep over at her ex's house. It even doesn't matter if they are having sex. It's very disrespectful of him and you should break up right now. Unless he stops doing that right away.It would be different if you were 100% sure he is totally over her and there's a good reason (like he's travelling far away and staying in a hotel would make it expensive). But again, that would be if and only if they were totally over each other.
...............................
A
male
reader, honestman  +, writes (4 April 2011):
I think that sleeping at his ex's house is way too much. He should get a hotel room. You are on your right to ask him not to sleep at her house. Staying at his ex's house is not very healthy for him, for his ex, and for you, even if it is cheaper for everybody.
...............................
|
