A
female
age
41-50,
*estiny1978
writes:my boyfriend went out of the country a year ago,school related cheated on me but denied it, rumor has it he got the girl pregnant. now this girl is also known to be a hoe, so should i believe him or the pple that think she is right but they also doubting her? because she has been seen with a guy before they got together and right after he left(he is not aware of this either) i think she wants money so she is pulling the babydaddy thing) P.S am pregnant too we are 2 weeks apart, so yeah he banged her first then 2 weeks later he banged me and vwala baby boy and girl 2 weeks apart, how about that, he doesnt know i know its stressing me out am almost due i wonna ask him after i give birth, dont want to cause any stress for me, am really tryin hard to pretend. what makes it easy is am soooo in love with him. they say love overcomes all will shall see. but i cant stop thinking about it, i would get quiet and cry because of the pain how can i handle this? i want a family but is he really worth this pain?
View related questions:
cheated on me, money Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (22 May 2012):
 I am glad you told him. Keeping it inside yourself is also stressful you know, and now the weight is off your shoulders and you can focus on yourself and your baby full time rather than spend hours and nights thinking about him and the other girl. What happened happened, and we can't change it. That's life for you. What you need to figure out, once you get there, is whether this is something you can live with or not. But you don't have to decide right now, the answer will come to you in time, so don't worry. You'll figure out what is best for you.
A
female
reader, destiny1978 +, writes (21 May 2012):
destiny1978 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthis is an update i did ask, i actually wrote him an email because i didnt want to start just shouting blabbing words so i wrote a long email and i gave him my 2 sences, he read it and he was in utter shock. he said that it was on a drunken day she didnt mean anything and didnt know her that well, i called that place he stayed in that country coz i had the person's # who stayed with him and he said its true that the gal is pregos and they dont know if he is the dad. so i guess DNA will be the only thing, he said it was a one night thing and he was also shocked when he found out she was pregos. he said he is sorry, and will do whatever to make it up. am gonna wait out coz am due anytime now, stressing is not good for me, so right now he's very embarrassed doesnt know what to do, so i feel better myself for telling him feels like i took a load of my back. thank you to those who anserwered
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2012): yes i know i have to talk to him but its more stressful talking about it the thing is my blood pressure has been alittle high and am trying not to stress, this can be a danger for and baby. i dont want to kill either of us. so if i can get thru this now i will talk to him and am also planning to go there next year, and i will see this girl get a DNA if possible but for now i just needed to vent it out, i cant talk to anybody yet at the same time i cant bottom it inside, writing this makes me feel like someone cares and thank you all for replying its good to get unbaised opinions. will update. keep posted
...............................
A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (19 May 2012):
So what you are asking is if love is worth accepting a man who cheated on you and will have a baby with another woman, and hasn't even told you about any of this yet?
You need to have a talk with him. It is one thing if he cheated, told you, and you are now deciding if you should stay or not. It is more of an issue when he cheated and simply didn't tell you, but is leading you on.
Often we think that if there is NO chance the other will find out, taking a secret to the grave is the best thing. But you DID find out. Him keeping it a secret from you then was only adding an extra burden to the cheating. He is now a liar as well as a cheater.
You need to talk to him. If there is another woman who will claim money from him then you need to be aware of it, and need to know about it. If your child as a sibling then your child deserves to know as well.
I don't think he is worth the pain. But that is for you to see. You can still have a family, but with another man. You aren't married to this man. You can find another man to marry, so that isn't the problem here. It's not like you have to choose, either this man or no man. The problem here is that you love him, but he is hurting you every day by continuing to lie to you about cheating, and the baby, and the probability of him having another child on the way. These problems will not go away by themselves.
...............................
A
female
reader, oldbag  +, writes (19 May 2012):
 Hi
Only one way to confirm if he is the Dad of the other girls baby, a DNA test. If she is already after his money then he needs to get this test done asap.
You need to talk to him tell him what you have heard and get it sorted out, not listen to idle gossip and rumours. The one thing thats good is she is in another country.However if he IS the dad and has to contribute financially then its going to be for many years.That baby is innocent and one day,IF he is the dad,he may want contact with this child.Best of Luck
First things first. Talk to him.
...............................
|
