A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend of two months is pending divorce from his wife. He is sometimes attentive and loving, sometimes moody and distant. I have done everything I can to show how I feel for him. Is this a lost cause or should I be more patient?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2008): nine months after my boyfriend and I got together- After falling madly in love - discussing the future and all its possibilities- he broke up with me because he needs his space. Sometimes men in emotional distress are not as in touch with their feelings as they lead both themselves and others to believe. For real success in the next relationship following divorce, significant time to digest the loss and grief related to the last relationship must take place. Unfortunately for those of us who have fallen for someone in such a situation - that very well may mean a great deal of time alone. Good luck to those of you in similar situations. Please don't compromise yourselves or what you need and deserve and remember if it is meant to be than it will.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2008): Hey, I'm going through a very similar situation. My boyfriend of two months is going through divorce with his wife. I wasn't the cause for their relationship to fail. We work closely together and fell for each other the first day we laid eyes on each other, I knew he was married and kept my distance. However as the closeness grew between us, the attraction became stronger. That's how we ended up together which I believe is true love as it wasn't based on looks or appearance. We are having a very painful time at the moment, arguing and hurting. He has moved out of the house and is planning for a divorce however I don't know dates. He says he feels pressured from his parents, his wife and for me and needs space.I'm being patient and giving him the space as I wan't this to work. Do the same and it will be worth it in the end I hope!! Good luck :) it's nice to see someone in the same situation as me!
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A
male
reader, Wild Thaing  + ♥, writes (29 July 2007):
 Give him space, and plenty of it.
It's clear that he is carrying some major baggage and needs to process the failure of his marriage. Have you considered that you are the rebound relationship for him?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 July 2007): Patient. He needs to mull things over in his head. Men deal with things differently than females, they are more internal.
Patience is a very good idea, dont' ask him questions, if he wants adive or support, he'll ask.
Just act like it's no biggie and when he is done being in his head, he'll be the guy you fell in love with and he will be grateful.
You don't have to give more or do more, he'll ask.
Also, get a book to read while he is in his head, you'll be amazed at what you read.
It's by John Gray titled Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus.
Best wishes.
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A
female
reader, shaye  +, writes (29 July 2007):
Hi, i think that you should just be patient and give him loads of support,he shouldnt be taking it out on u though because thats not fair. i think that u need to sit him down and talk to him about how your feeling,he may not relise that he is being like this. i hope things get better for you soon x
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A
male
reader, quarky  + ♥, writes (29 July 2007):
It goes without saying almost that the divorce will probably be a major stress between you two. Have you discussed this at all - and if not, maybe you should?
Whether it's a lost cause or not depends, I guess, on what sort of time and effort you both want to put in understanding and communicating about the issues.
The very fact you ask the question may in itself be the answer.
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