A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi i am 21 and my partner is 23. we been together 6 months but known each other 8 yrs. i am a mum to a 4 yr old. me and my partner used to have sex all the time.....about 4/5 times a week, now everytime i go to touch him or blow him he pushes me away. 20 mins later he ses he needs the toilet and he is up there for about 45 mins. and he takes his phone if it has credit and i know he goes on porn. i have nothing against masturbating. but 24/7 is a bit much especially when ive tried to do it then he goes and does it himself. it makes me feel inferior. i like watching porn as well it gives me ideas but he likes them more than me. ive caught him dowloading porn on my laptop, on his phone. its getting too much ive tried everything if i talk to him i get snapped at. oh im 6 wks pregnant. he started all this about a month before i found out . i love him so much but i cant stand being replaced :'( i feel like crap.baby was planned. 1st child i fell when i was 16, his daddy took advantage enough said. and my new partner is a dad himself. and he started doing this before i found out i was preg.
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhe started doing it again couple months ago and i caught him thismornin.....he actualli lying to me and saying i dont do it wats the point...swearing on our daughters life....he dont know how it makes me feel i dont kno wat to do :'(
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2012): I too agree and find it odd they would choose a vid/pic over a real woman.I don't even know why men think it's acceptable to masturbate to porn in a relationship to be honest.
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A
male
reader, JustHelpinAgain  +, writes (26 March 2012):
Until recently I couldn't believe a guy would prefer porn to a real woman but you are the third woman to mention this in the last couple of weeks. It help much but I am sorry for you and can understand how bad you feel. I can only suggest that you talk calmly with your man and explain you love him and are really horny and need more SEX!! Don't start accusing him of stuff or calling names. For me I find a newly pregnant woman incredibly erotic, especially when a little bump appears - at least when I know I put it there!!
There only thing to check is if you bf is having erection problems. Then wacking to porn is less stressful to him and proves it works - I mention this because 45 minutes in the bathroom is a very long time if he really is doing what you think he is??
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A
female
reader, person12345  +, writes (24 March 2012):
 If someone became an alcoholic, would you blame yourself? No, it is NOT because of you, it is not your fault.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionit makes me feel inferior and shitty, its the fact he started it b4 i gt pregnant....and he had no problem having sex with his ex parnter wen she was pregnant. i dont understand its getting me so down, i will have words. thanks
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A
male
reader, Uncle PJ  +, writes (23 March 2012):
 It would seem that your partner may be suffering an addiction to porn. Even though he started it before you were pregnant, some guys, for some reason, find it unattractive to have sexual contact with their pregnant partner. That must horrible for you to read but you must realise that this isn't your fault. You are still attractive and his issues with it are his problems, it is absolutely not your fault.
I understand that he doesn't like being confronted, but you may have to try and tell him how you feel about him using porn in this way and feel that it is replacing you. Does your partner know you also enjoy porn? If he doesn't, maybe ask if you can watch with him as it does help some couples intimately.
If he continues to push you away then maybe try to seek some sort of psychological help to try and help him from this addiction. It may also make him realise that he does still have a beautiful woman of a partner despite being pregnant. But not only that, she is also carrying his beautiful baby and he should proud of what is due to happen in the near future. I wish you all the best with the baby and hope that he can see past this issue to make you feel better about yourself again.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (23 March 2012):
Pornography has the potential to be addictive, with around 15% of users developing a problem that interferes with their lives. It sounds like this is what has happened with your bf, maybe he got nervous after finding out you were pregnant, but for whatever reason it seems to have gotten out of hand. It has nothing to do with you. The only way it can get better is if he is able to realize he has a problem and work on it. You can try to get him see, and to suggest therapy, but if after a reasonable effort he is unwilling to try, there is nothing you can do.
http://yourbrainonporn.com/tools-for-change
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