A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello everyone-I really need some advice. My boyfriend of 5 months just cheated on me. I dont know what to think or how to act. I know he loves me and i love him. He is my soulmate. He admitted everything. I found the condoms in his car, and we dont use them. He texts me everyday with 3 page texts saying how much he loves me and he is sorry and blah blah. Even my friends and family feel the love we have. We can be in a room full of people and only pay attention to ourselfs. I cry everyday and just dont know what to do. Please help. Thanks.
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cheated on me, condom, soulmate, text Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI think that's what I'm going to do; make him wait a couple weeks. or more. But I am in a state of depression. i have lost 10 pounds in a couple days. i just don't know how I will get thro this but I have to. thank you for everything! that's the answer I was hoping for,.
A
female
reader, blawndie +, writes (5 March 2009):
 does he have any sort of relationship with her? does he feel regretful? do you really truly think he won't do it again, do you think you can trust him? i think you should talk to him about it exclusively, you should talk to him about it a lot, exhaust the topic, try to make him explain exactly WHY he felt he had to do it. and if at the end, you feel like he truly made a big mistake, if you can trust him again and if your relationship can rebuild after something like that, then i say try it again. if you can look past it and past your insecurities, i would be inspired by your strength! i hope it all works out for you! but yeah, really talk to him about it, understand what happened and try to forgive him only if he's really sorry. make sure you weigh out all the pros and cons too. don't throw away an amazing loving relationship just because he made a mistake.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionsome high schooler. i was out of town for two days & thats when he did it.
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A
female
reader, blawndie +, writes (5 March 2009):
wait... he was smoking? that's it? well who did he cheat on you with??
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionblawndie. Thank you so much, that really helped me, but here's more detail. He was smoking and that was it, which does not impair your judgement like alcohol so I do not believe that, and the other thing is in his last relationship his ex was going around on him so he cheated on her to get revenge. Is that considered cheating in as what he did to me? thanksss. [:
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2009): I would forgive him. Maybe he really is sorry and it was a huge mistake. He is only human and people make mistakes all the time. However make it clear that you wont put up with that crap anymore. And I would be cautious at first. Protect your feelings because nothing hurts worse than betrayal.
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A
female
reader, blawndie +, writes (4 March 2009):
It's a lot easier to tell yourself you'd leave someone if they ever cheated on you but when you're actually going through that, it's a lot harder. You have to weigh the pros and the cons. like the before poster said, it depends on the circumstances, did your boyfriend cheat repeatedly, as in had some kind of relationship with the person or was it a one night stand and he was drunk? Not saying that either is better or less/more serious, but mistakes do happen. If you really love him and believe he loves you and you guys can continue to trust each other and really believe he won't do it again, then I'd say forgive him and try again.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2009): Well I'd say if it was just a one night stand I would just get over it. Most guys are pretty weak when there's a woman offering. If he just did it and that was the end of it I think youre gonna survive. If he is still talking to her then there's a problem.
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