A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:I don't know how and i don't know why i fell for him so hard!Please bear with me it's an emotional subject for me!I was in a one sided love relationship with D where i really wanted to love him back but the only love i felt was friendship! Then he went over seas and i started seeing H, he was absolutely amazing! He made me laugh and we always had fun together! We started spending alot of time together more than we used to, (we were friends before) we were perfect for each other but there were 2 flaws in our perfect relationship D(2 year relationship) and his girlfriend (4 year relationship) it was supposed to be a fun fling that turned into an unofficial official relationship!I fell in love with him and he fell for me, we were seeing each other for about 3 months and it was the best 3months of my life, then he went to Cape Town for 5 days, i dropped him off at the airport and he almost missed his flight because he didn't want to leave me! But when he came back he wasn't the man i left at the airport, i saw him the day he got back but only the evening, he didn't even call to say he was back! After that he stopped returning my calls, then when i did see him a week later, he broke up with me saying that he doesn't want to get into a serious relationship because he had come out of a long term relationship with A ( he broke up with her to be with me)and he said he wanted to meet other people! I was devastated!Then i find out that he is back together with her!I'm crushed! I'm normally a strong person and i normally get over heartbreaks easily, but for some strange reason i can't get over him! it's been almost 4 months during that time i have tried to commit suicide twice, i cut myself to try and stop the hurt i still do, i even stabbed D because he bad mouthed H! I think i'm losing my mind and i don't know what to do!How do i get over him because it hurts like hell having these feelings! Or how do i tell him how i feel? is it a good i dea to tell him i love him as i have never told him!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2007): i wish there was a silver bullet that stopped us from feeling like crap and alone after a brake up but hun im affraid there isnt.
the only thing that helps, is time. we all (well most) think of our partners as perfect and after a brake up we pine for them and feel lonely, but you have to pick your head up. go out and live the single life again. go with your mates. you dont have to have a partner to have fun in life.
A
female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (16 January 2007):
Hi there,
I understand how much you are hurting right now. I know it feels like crap and like perhaps there is nothing worth living for if you cant be with him (hence why you tried to kill yourself?). But darling you have to remember how life was before he came along. Perhaps before you even started having bf's. There is sooooo much in life that can make you happy, dont let yourself happines be dependent on a guy. No one is worth your tears...or your death. You have to stop reminding yourself of all the good things about him as this will only make you miss him more. Instead, think of the bad things about him. He isnt perfect, as no1 is...so dont put him up on a pedastal like you have been, he doesnt deserve to be up there.
Have you talked to anyone like friends or family about how your feeling? I think since you have had alot of trouble dealing with loosing him you shoudl perhaps talk to a counsellor. This doesnt mean yoru crazy ok. It just means talking to someone hwo is trained to deal with probelms will be able to help you. They have a good understanding of how you are feeling and will help you work through what your going through. good luck and all the best.
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