A
female
age
30-35,
*itty_3
writes:My two best friends went on vacation together without me and now one keeps texting me and telling me all the fun things they did/ the hot guys they met. i was hurt enough just finding out about it. now, it's like adding insult to injury, you know?this is the second time they've gone somewhere without me, but the first time, the friend who's texting me tried to be discreet, which i appreciated.how can i get over this? what should i do?
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best friend, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, the angela  +, writes (19 February 2009):
Hello My love. Are these really good friends. One seems to be a wind up merchant as we say in england.This is not fair on you, why not be open and say this what we are doing,would you like to come.Truth is honey they are probably not having as much fun as they say.When they come bacj have your on holiday and tell them to get lost. You sound sao caring and concerned you are going to find much better,truer,friends. Come To The UK,you have one here.Tell them to go away and mix with people as true and as nice as you.
A
female
reader, kitty_3 +, writes (19 February 2009):
kitty_3 is verified as being by the original poster of the question and no, they don't go to the same school. we all go to different schools and 2 of us live much closer than the 2 of them.
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A
female
reader, kitty_3 +, writes (19 February 2009):
kitty_3 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhow should i ask them? i don't want to be all confrontational... i don't want to make it awkward or obvious that i'm hurt.
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A
female
reader, wonderingcat +, writes (19 February 2009):
 Hi Kitty,
With a name like that, how could anyone not invite you? (hug)
But seriously, did you ever ask them why they did that? You said this is the second time? Could it be because they may be afraid to ask you because you had other committments, or that they were embarrassed to ask if you could afford it? Or perhaps they wanted to do something that they think you would not approve? There could be many reasons, but right now you need not spending any energy speculating on them. Just ask them when they return. Life is too short. Instead, I am sure you can still do lots of fun things that you probably would not be able to do with your two best friends. Right?
In principle, however, I think a previous aunt (female anonymous) is also correct. If your two best friends find that they could (or would) not communicate with you on things that are important as far as being best friends, then maybe you need to look for new best friends.
But having said that, sure it hurts to be left behind and not be part of the "team" right now, but I think you are blessed now with an important lesson in life on learning people's characters.
You know what? When you do stuff on your own and have lots of fun even without them, I bet you they'll be envious of you too. But I know you will not be doing that on purpose (e.g. revenge), right? You are just moving on and being an independent person, who are comfortable being on your own as well as being in a team.
Have fun and enjoy life. Keep safe!
Cat
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A
female
reader, kitty_3 +, writes (19 February 2009):
kitty_3 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell... it would be easy enough to cut them off since they don't go to my school and i have plenty of friends there. but i've known them since i was less than a year old... i wish i could make it work.
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A
male
reader, gumbbo +, writes (19 February 2009):
It seems they are better friends with each other than with you, they probably are just closer. I'm sure they don't mean to be hurtful. Surely you have or can find other friends to spend your time with. Leave to to it for a bit. Then guess who they'll come running to when they have a fall out which they will at some point.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2009): You should get some new best friends
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