A
male
age
36-40,
*raigw85
writes:My ex and i broke up about a year ago and didnt speak to eachother. Recently she contacted me on Facebook and said she was sorry about the way things were left. I still have feelings for her so i accepted her apology. She then asked me for my number and was texting me all the time, we met up for a few drinks and have been to a theme park for the day. My big dilema is that she is engaged to be married and i dont think she wants to be with him. How do i let her know how i feel and see if she really would leave him? How do i tell her there are still feelings and test her commitment to her fiancée with whom her relationship is unstable?
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female
reader, thatgothgirl20  +, writes (27 July 2009):
 Tell her what you are feeling. If she doesn't feel the same way, then just be her friend if she will let you and stay friends.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2009): I think you should tell her how you feel about her. You guys were engaged that means you loved eachother, and you can't just stop loving someone. She contacted you, she has to know that most likely you still love her. And maybe she loves you too but because of her engagement she doesn't want to tell you first. Tell her, you'll regret it if you don't.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2009): She has already made a promise to someone else for happily ever after, and I think it is probably unlikely that anything you do or say will change that for her.
I think she cares for you and wanted to let you know about her wedding. I don't think this was an attempt on her part to see if you would tell her of your undying love.
She has made a commitment and that is what true love is about, not feelings. That is where most of us get screwed up about what love really is...it isn't feelings.
That said, if you feel you must, tell her of your undying love and give her the option of calling off her wedding. I just wouldn't hold a lot of hope out that she will change her mind. She after all knows you love her or she wouldn't be contacting you now. She just wants to let you know of the happy event and that she has genuine feelings for you and doesn't want you to think her decision has to do with her lack of love for you. She thought enough of you to let you know that she is happy.
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