A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am a 24 yr old female and I have been in casual relationship with a guy older than i am for a little more than 3 years now. But during all this time, we never really shared any kind of bond except mindblowing sexual chemistry. Sex has always been awesome with him.. It allowed me to grow on a different level.. overcome some inhibitions and blockages. But somehow i feel empty even after all this time.. it's as if i still don't know him and it disturbs me.. I seek more complicity and find it more fulfilling than just casual sex. He doesnt want a normal relationship due to past issues with his ex. But he claims he sees only me and want nobody else for sex. But now, i've got this coworker who makes me laugh all day like a silly girl at work, teases me about my embarassing moments.. his mere presence uplifts my mood and every day at work, however tiring it might be, ends my day with a big smile.. sometimes i catch myself smiling alone. I don't fancy him in a sexual way. I just like him. So i feel guilty towards my fu**friend and i'm unable to initiate sex. I've expressed my feelings about it to him and that i wanted to stop but he says he's gonna make an effort to spend more time with me or he wants me one last time.. I'm scared i might just give in back to him if ever i agree..QUESTION: I wonder if he's genuine about it (from a male opinion) or he just wants to have one last good time? I'd appreciate opinions from both males and females :) thank you
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at work, co-worker, girl at work, his ex Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your opinions ladies and urbanking99 :) I really appreciate :)
The guy at work is also my classmate.. we've never talked before in class until we ended at the same workplace on job placement. He's very goofy .. i think i kinda like him too
A
male
reader, urbanking99  +, writes (13 August 2009):
I totally agree with Emilysanswers and Honeypie.
FWB is what you agreed to in the beginning if the dynamic changes then both people need to change.
The guy at work maybe more interested than you think but is too shy to say or do anything as it is a work place and may not be tolerated by your bosses. By all means keep him as a Friend but let him know where you stand.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (13 August 2009):
 No he doesn't just want ONE last bump and grind. He wants to SHOW you what it is you two have - GOOD SEX.
If you want to move on and TRY a real relationship then you need to cut the old guy loose. No contact, no more sex.
You can not really move forward with that still hanging over you. End one thing before you start a new. Get the picture?
Good luck :)
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (13 August 2009):
This Freind with benefits doesn't want to have a relationship with you so if you move on then it's his own stupid fault for being scared to call you his "girlfriend."
To be honest, if you do want a proper relationship with him, the BEST thing you can do is say "I'm sorry but I want a boyfriend. You aren't prepared to do that so I'm not wasting more time on you. Good bye."
He'll realise what an idiot he is and come after you.
As for the guy at work. If you don't like him like that then just carry on as you are. Don't lead him on that he has a chance and just be his friend.
Good Luck!! xx
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