A
male
age
30-35,
*chill1689
writes:so i've decided to stay with my current gf and just wait. love is more important to me than sex.i do have some what of another problem though. i kinda do and kinda dont want to join the army (marines) but my gf said she would dump me if i did. i've always wanted to, but for a while, i hated the idea. well now i've been thinking about it again, and with all the benefits and college money, i've become really interested. but i really want to keep my gf as well. is there anyway i could convince her not to dump me? thanks
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2007): Thats really terrible that she is giving you that ultimatum. I have learned in my own short life that you should make a decision based on your own feelings and thoughts, not based on what anyone else wants you to do. There are plenty of other women out there.
Also, this could become a pattern to get you to do what she wants in the future. If she finds that it works for this situation she most likely wont hesitate to use it again, so keep that in mind as well.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2007): Your Girlfriend is smart and doesn't want to see you wasted. Go to college instead and stick with her. Most people who join the service who aren't married break up, that and those who are married have a high rate of divorce. Do you expect someone to wait for you when your away for up to 9 months at a time? You wouldn't want to do that for her would you?
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A
male
reader, GreenTea +, writes (3 August 2007):
two choices
1)stick with your current gf where you may eventually break up
2) break up, join the marines, find new gf.
choose one of those two.
-Tea
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A
female
reader, Basschick  +, writes (3 August 2007):
 Well that's just really tacky of her to hold you back on your dreams. First of all, you need to make up your mind completely if you want to do this because it is a big thing. Secondly, I would not let any woman (or man) hold me back from doing something I truly want to do and if she dumps you, well guess what? she wasn't worth having to begin with. Do you really want this woman manipulating you on every decision you make from here on out? Because this will only be the beginning and I seriously think you'd like to be the one to wear the pants in this relationship, wouldn't you? It's your future. She can either chose to be in it, or out of it. Either way you'll come out a winner.
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A
female
reader, katiexkx  +, writes (3 August 2007):
hi,well i can probably tell u what your girl friend is thinking, as this is the reason why i split up with my boy friend about 3 weeks ago. since we started going out he always wanted to go into the army. he applied but did not get in. after that he promised me he would never try again because he didnt want to lose me. i believed him and a yr and half down the line, he decided he wanted to try again. i said i could not be with him as he had promised me he wouldnt do this but did. the reason i did not want him to go in is cos i loved him that much it would kill me if anything happened to him and i could not live worrying about him. also the fact that i would never get to see him that often would break my heart, so i dont think it is because she doesnt want to support u i think its because she loves you that much she couldn't handle the pain of u going away, and the worry of the fact you could get hurt.
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A
female
reader, shaye  +, writes (3 August 2007):
Is your gf for real!? thats so mean! this sounds like something u really want and ur gf should respect that and support u not dump u! u shouldnt let a woman come between u and your dreams. i say go for it,if this is what u really want then do it! Its a great opportunity. If your gf really loves u she will support u and be thre 100% for u if not she isnt the one for u. Good luck xx
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A
female
reader, Shan14 +, writes (3 August 2007):
 Well is she doesn't want you to do something you really want to do, she not good for you. Maybe talk to her about why she doesn't want you to join. She might just be scared of losing you.Hope this helps?
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A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (3 August 2007):
 Honey you girlfriend should be supportive of what career you want to acchieve not emotionally blackmail you into staying with her because she doesnt agree with your ambiton. Am I missing the point here? I thought most women are a SUCKER for that sort of thing and go weak at the knees when they see a guy in a uniform. (Or maybe its just me) LOL. Don't be bullied into staying with her, she obviously does not care for you enough to stand by her man and let him fulfill his dreams as I am sure you would if said she dreamt of being a Top Model or Actress, this is only an example but you get my drift don't you hun xx. If you feel strongly about becoming a Marine you jolly well go and do it, but look don't at the glamourous side of it look at the tough and not so glamourous side of becoming a Marine. Please let me know how you get on my love and the very best of luck.
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