| A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I need help here please. I met a guy and we was speaking on the phone every day and things was going fine. I only been talking to him for 2 weeks because that's how long it's been since we been talking. I really like him. He said he like talking to me and staying up talking to me. He said he wants to take me out on a date. And said we would set a date. We did a video chat because he wants to talk to me and it went great. The next day around 9pm he called me and ask me what I am wearing and I said shirts. He said send me a picture and I said no.he was upset and I ask him why upset and he responded you don't have to ask. And I said to him we don't have to fight we can hangup the phone.and he said that's all you can do. And we hang up. I texted him saying don't contact me and I regret it right away. the next day he didn't text me or call me. The next day I texted him saying I am sorry for what I said over the text. I called him he doesn't respond. It's been 5 days since he hasn't reach to me. I really miss him I enjoyed talking to him. What should I do? I miss him. I see him on Facebook but he doesn't call me or text me. Please help what should I do? Was he honest from the beginning?
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2019): Social media and device-dedicated communications become addictive over a short period of time.
Some people are extremely prone to the habit-forming effects of texting and phone conversations. It's popular to try to conduct romance by phone and device; and as a result, you give people a lot of power to make you feel rejected if they are slow to answer or ignore your contact-attempts.
Contacts and friends are accumulated in multitudes on social media; and we habitually collect phone numbers we rarely, or never actually call. It has become a status symbol to have loads of followers and a huge number of contacts. In the process, people become arrogant and conceited by their so-called social media popularity.
You are a victim of a con-man who gets women interested; requests pics of them, and he may or may not ever actually meet-up with you. He'll just add you to his porn file of pics for play-time.
You, like far too many people these days, are overwhelmed by rejection; but it becomes even more disturbing when it's someone you've connected with by social media. and have exchanged a lot of messages and calls. You can spy on him and tell he's actively online, but not answering your contact-attempts. It has negative psychological-effect. The silent-treatment is extremely effective; because it cuts off any attempt to plead your case.
You attached feelings to a man you've never met. You get a dopamine-high everytime he talks, or you have a video chat. He's now playing on that addiction. It seems women are quite susceptible to online-romances; and get hooked on men they only know by what they've heard about him. Not what they've seen with their own eyes, or have had a chance to evaluate in-person.
You have no official relationship or true romantic-connection. He only wanted to see your boobs and a few racy pics to add to his collection. You didn't comply. You were seduced by his charms, but you didn't play ball. Why send some dude you never met sexy-pics of you scantily clothed? That should have been a red-flag, but you've formed an attachment based on basically nothing.
Now the head-games begin. There is a great number of females who get phone-attached. They meet men online, and guys play them. Learn to hold your feelings in-check until you know whom you're getting so attached to!!!
They'll take advantage of your loneliness. They can read your desperation by your over-willingness to chat for hours. He was testing you when he could keep you drawn and chained to your phone all hours, and almost everyday. First get you hooked, then ask for little favors. Dangle the promise of a date, and see if she'll bite. The devil sweet-talked and promised Jesus the world! Talk is cheap, sweetheart! You were only talking! That is, until you refused to send some pics of your lady-parts!
If you had sent the pic, you may have never seen a date; unless there was a guarantee sex would happen on the first-date. He kept you going to get you attached, to see how far you'd go to get a boyfriend. You declined, so your callback and apology showed him you're on the hook. Now all he has to do is hold-out. Then he'll call, make a date, and you'll be more pliable for sex.
That's how it works, my dear. Learn how to minimize too much phone-communication. If he's interested in dating, reserve your feelings until you know exactly what kind of person and personality you're dealing with. What you're told online, what you see on Facebook, and social media; are all manufactured and created personas. What you got attached to may be nothing like your perception.
If you're smart, you'll block and delete him. He only wanted to see what's under your shirt.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2019): Hi
He hasn't called you because all he wants from you is sex via video chat and photos and when you refused he lost interest.
Good for you by the way, I'm pleased that you refused this man that you barely know, intimate pictures of yourself. Men use the internet like a sex shop and well done you for not being his sex toy!
Leave him where he is and find a man who is interested in you for things other than sex.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (1 October 2019):
 He is punishing you with silence. You didn't want to send him photos on demand (which is REASONABLE of you) so he got pissy. YOU do not owe him ANY pictures.
BUT he is also doing as YOU requested, NOT contacting you.
It's been ONLY two weeks and there is THIS level of "drama"? I'd say remove him from Facebook and stop following him, block his number and delete it. Time to move on.
Next time you meet a guy and he asks for pictures, instead of making a big deal out of it, tell him to set a date for meeting up so you can SEE each other in person.
If you keep TRYING to get this guy to talk to you you will keep having DRAMA with this guy, one way or another.
You both acted childish. Maybe he felt you were too drama filled and cut you off or he is playing mind-games - EITHER way, he isn't worth your time.
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