A
female
age
22-25,
*andgeek
writes:I like this guy and he knows that I like him. One of my closest friends is also a guy. The problem is that my friend seems to get closer to me when ever the guy I like comes to talk to me. It is then that my friend says that we were just leaving. How do I become closer to the guy I like without hurting my friend? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, bandgeek +, writes (7 December 2011):
bandgeek is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you. Those are really good solutions.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2011): That sounds like a love triangle. Have you ever considered that your guy friend likes you?? and plus if you have told this other guy you like him and he has not said anything maybe you should move on and start getting close to your guy friend. If you want to get close with out your friend knowing, get this guys number and talk to him.
Hope it helps :):)
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2011): My teen daughter, youngest, went through the same thing. *sighs* Trying to remember what she did.
Don't let the 'friend' speak for you. You speak for yourself. Letting friend do this says you and him are more an exclusive couple and you are not. So stand up for your boudaries.
Its a choice to hurt. Why would friend be hurt? Because he likes you too? Liking you is his choice.
Its not fair of Friend to be possessive of you. He's not a BF so stop letting him act like one.
Move away from him anytime he does that whole, she's mine Crush Dude. Smile at Crush Dude. Body langauge alone will tell friend your intentions and meaning as well as Crush Dude. Step towards Crush when he is nearby.
IF Friend still persists, tell him outright. Please don't ruin my chances with my Crush. I like him and you are acting oddly when he is around. Not cool.
Eventually, Friend will get it. He will have to accept that you are not his property and you have your agency to like whom you like or even date whom you like.
Friend will get over it. He will know he was a Friend and come to terms with it.
BTW, my youngest teen and her Friend are still Friends. She has never dated anyone, just has crushes, her Friend has dated many girls. He no longer acts like that towards her. He even gets information on a guy she likes for her. Even encourages her to ask her current crush out to a movie. They get along great. Still Buds.
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2011): I think you should talk to your friend and find out exactly what his reasons are for acting that way. You could tell him about how you like that guy and want to get closer to him.
If he truly is your friend he will help you and respect that you like the guy and might even help you out. However, it does sound like your friend's feeling for you are more than just friendly.
If this is true, he might be hurt by the fact that you don't like him but like the other guy instead. Maybe your friend already knows this and is jealous and trying to keep you from your crush.
Either way, you should have an honest and open conversation with your friend. That's what friends do!
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2011): I suggest you be honest with your friend and tell him that you would like to get to know this other guy. I think your close guy friend may have a bit of a crush on you, and if that is the case there is no way that you can do this without hurting him. If he is your close friend you should be able to be honest with him and tell him you want to get to know this guy, it's the best way to go about it and best way to not ruin a good friendship. Good Luck.
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