A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:We have been together for around 7 months for now and I am starting to feel that he no longer have that "wanting" feeling for me than last time. Is it because we are spending more time together (like 4 times per week) than before that is causing this feeling of him neglecting me?He has many friends including boys and girls and now he has start to upload more photos on his facebook with his friends than before. He doesn't like to upload photos on facebook but now things changes.Thursday will be our 7th month anniversary and I have made a video for him as I am trying to get the sparks back. I don't know if guys will appreciate this effort or will i appear to be very clingy towards him instead? I am confused but I am just puting in effort to get the sparks back......
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female
reader, kirra07  +, writes (13 September 2010):
Relationships are only one part of our lives. There are family, friends, work, personal hobbies, etc. Yes, relationships are a large part, but other things need to play a role as well. In the beginning of the relationship, things are new and you just want to get to know your partner, so you might spend more time with them, and less on these other aspects. But as the relationship progresses, there should be more balance. So it's natural that he wants to spend more time with friends. As long as you two still spend quality time together and he doesn't try to hide his outside interests, I would say that things are progressing normally. Just be supportive. Let him do his own thing and find your own thing to do. Show him you can be independent too. But do try to bring some spark back, that's great. Go on dates. Try new things together. Just don't expect or demand that he spend all his time with you.
A
male
reader, anogymous  +, writes (13 September 2010):
My GF and I were nigh inseparable for almost a full year. After that long I began to miss hanging out with my friends, and even family. (we hung out A-LOT, and I have a ton of patience.) But, I was always haveing to be the lover and never the other half of myself I am. After another year and a half of this, I couldn't stand her anymore, resenting me for wanting my guy time, and broke it off.
Guys NEED their guy time. If you truly trust him, or at least trust him enough, let him be for a while. Trust me he will appreciate it. If he has been posting more pics than usual of friends then I'd say that's a definite sign. One last thing he needs to go by himself. call up some of your friends and hang out together your selves.
I hope I was able to help, and I truly hope it all works out for you two! It really sucks to have to walk away from or lose someone you care deeply about.
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A
male
reader, jimrich +, writes (13 September 2010):
You get the 'sparks' back by knowing exactly how and a little forum may not give you enough info about it.
I suggest that you google: relationship tips or relationship skills and study up on how to make a relationship work. When you understand some of the techniques/methods, you can explain them to your partner to see if both of you can make it work. (it takes two)
It isn't some deep, scary mystery but needs more space and time than I can offer right now. You need to LEARN how and it takes some study and practice. All I can tell you is the simple, obvious methods of making a relationship work are good for us and I wish I had been given this tip when I was younger because I did not have a clue how to make a good relationship.
Also, any book store or library can offer you sources for learning about relationships so it's up to you to either learn something or go on blindly bumbling along and getting hurt or hurting others.
good luck learning how
:) Jim
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