A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:So I recently met a guy at work, we flirted a couple of weeks, he asked for my number and invited me out. We went rock climbing indoors, it was fantastic but I broke a pretty bad sweat. We went to dinner after and the convo went well. There were no awkward lulls, no one was dominating, good eye contact and laughs were present. He kept bringin up things we could do together and when we walked to his car he told me how much fun he had, what a great time it was, etc. I agreed of course. He drove me home and I invited him in to see my puppy since we had talked about pets. He came in and we had more good conversation. The problem is that I made a huge faux pas on sitting on a different couch from him. I have two seats and was nervous and self conscious about if I smelled sweaty from earlier, so I plopped down on the second seat but was still sitting by him. Anyway he eventually got up to leave an we lingered at the door for a bit, he even brought up another topic of convo, but we only ended up hugging. I was too nervous to try to kiss. He said something again about how nice of a time he had and I said thank you and he left. He had a 30 hour shift at the hospital sat to sun 6pm so I didn't expect to hear from him those days. But he never contacted me Monday either. Our date was Friday so it is now day number 4. I'm afraid he won't call, I think I ruined the date at the end and am sad bc we had a great time and this was the first guy since my ex that I have been attracted to. Should I even bother to text a message like "hey hope work went well and you had a fun labor day weekend, I had a great time Friday but my legs were so sore sat lol" just to clear up the possible mixed signals I sent? Or just cut my losses? I am completely overanalyzing at this point but I thought he would for sure call me and now I am kicking my arse for the wrong moves I made at the end of the date. Argh
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2011): I am the original poster. So I sent him the text that night, no response. To be honest I don't know that he got it, or that his reply would even get to me. We both have iphones on different carriers and he once texted me and I never got it, he even proved it to me by showing me his reply one day last week. That was when we were setting up the original date. Anyway, I just accepted the fact he must not be THAT interested and if he was he would one day call. I went to work today, and oddly enough got to the lecture that was scheduled right after him. I saw the back of him and contemplated running like the 13 yr old me might have. But then decided no, I might have to see him again and no need for drama at work. So he turned and saw me, and walked over to me smiling at me. Talked to me quite a bit actually, kept whispering to me during lecture, followed me to breakfast. Of course he used the excuse that he has been "so busy" studying and preparing for a presentation that he has to do this weekend and is traveling today to the city he is giving the presentation in. He'll be gone all weekend and has an exam Tuesday. He was nice, and once again kept mentioning things for us to do, even asking me again if I was interested in doing some training with him for a marathon. I just agreed, told him have a nice weekend, and good luck with the presentation. I figure he's not THAT interested, and there may be a chance for a friendship. For now that is fine with me, and probably good that i'm not getting involved with yet another guy that is less into me than I am him.
A
male
reader, Daniel the love doctor +, writes (7 September 2011):
 O.k. well I don't think your smell was the issue. You both went rock climbing, to dinner, and even after that time he talked about how much fun he had- and hung out a bit with you in your house. I do think however that it's possible you misinterpreted his signals. There's a chance he only sees you as a friend. Which may explain the hug.
OR...
He wasn't sure himself if you like him- and was hesitant to go for the kiss. This is why I think it would be best for you to have a conversation to find out where you two stand. If he's interested in you, in hanging out again, etc. Communication is key.
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A
female
reader, angelDlite  +, writes (6 September 2011):
 he was probably nervous too and may feel like you were not really into him coz you were not close to him at the end of the date. i see no harm in sending him the text you mentioned. he will probably be really pleased to hear from you. if he doesn't get back in contact then at least you will know, and you will not have the 'what if' factor. you have waited for 4 days, it is not like you have jumped in an texted him the next day like a pest, don't worry, just text him
x
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