A
female
age
41-50,
kimber224
writes:Was dating a guy for past 9 months. Everyone once in a while, he would send me these bizarre text messages (I believe he is drunk when he sends them) and accuses me of things that were ridiculous...like why did the gardener have my garage code and he didn't.......that I trusted my gardener more than him. Then, he wouldn't call me for the rest of the weekend, but call me from work on Monday morning. Very bizarre. I got tired of this after the 4th or 5th time and ended the relationship. Was I too quick to let it go, or does it seem odd to others as well? Any advice?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 March 2008): Smart girl. That kind of thing is like a big red warning flag. Don't start questioning your good sense now.
A
female
reader, thatgothgirl20 +, writes (12 March 2008):
 I think that you did the right thing.
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A
male
reader, Collaroy  + ♥, writes (12 March 2008):
 Hi,
It looks like he has a problem with the booze. These are the sort of comments that rear their ugly head when the liquor takes hold.
It was a good idea to move on. Good luck in the future.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2008): He does seem a little bit too insecure. It is hard to comment in detail without more examples of his behaviour and more information about your relationship and what is and isn't shared between the two of you.Clearly he thought or thinks that your having it off with the gardener. He seems to want you to consider him a higher status than the "gardener" in your life. Which is perhaps indicitive of how threatened he is about men in your life. But again, with only this example and no historical info, who knows. People often txt when pissed! Sometimes it alerts us to the headspace they are in. It is not necessarily a sane headspace at the time, but never the less, also not to be ignored or addressed.Not sure really if anything help there. But it does sound like he has a problem with something your NOT doing. Which in itself, is a problem!
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A
female
reader, baby duck + ♥, writes (12 March 2008):
 No. I do not think you were too quick to let it go.
Back in my single days, I was accused of 'not caring' because I did not share when I was jealous. Since then, I have learned to share when I feel jealous, but I always do it respectfully. For example, if I were in your ex'es shoes, I would have said, "My feelings are hurt that the gardner has your garage code, but I don't." That way, I would not have accused my boyfriend of doing something 'wrong', but I would have been open about my hurt feelings.
Truth be told, I don't think I would have gotten upset over that. I mean, why should I have access to someone's house?
People that do stupid things when they're drunk ought to limit how often they get drunk, too. Another reason it was probably a good thing to let that fishy go back to the pond.
Rest easy. He was more trouble than he was worth.
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