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Is stealing a shirt really such a horrible thing? Will this affect my job application?

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Question - (7 September 2012) 22 Answers - (Newest, 30 November 2012)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Hello again, I posted a question a few days ago about a test I had to take for a job. Well I passed the test, yay! But now I am into the background check and then onto a lie detector/polygraph test.

I have a couple questions about this. One, has anyone taken a lie detector test before? And how was it? What did they ask?

Two, the application said to be extremely honest. Even if it doesn't sound good, they prefer honesty. It is for a police department position. Now on the application it asks if you have ever shoplifted. When I was 15/16 I stole a shirt from a store while with a friend. I'm 24 now. It was stupid kid stuff and I have never stolen anything else in my life. Do I put this on my application or do I leave it alone and hope it isn't asked about? I was never caught so it wouldn't be found out in the background check. But if they asked on the polygraph I could come up as lying if I said I have never stolen anything.

Also, is stealing a shirt so horrible? When talking to my husband I said I thought it wasn't so bad and normal for a person to steal something at some point in their lives. He said it is absolutely not normal and he nor does anyone he know, has ever stolen anything. So has anyone else stolen something once and is not a bad person or is this worse than I thought? He worried me and made me scared to fess up to it on the application.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (30 November 2012):

Honeypie agony auntGreat news!!

I'm glad it paid off to be honest and upfront!

Good luck!

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (30 November 2012):

So_Very_Confused agony auntYay! congrats OP!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2012):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

A final update, I passed the lie detector, passed the staff interview, and just took the psych test. I pretty much have the job at this point. It's been a very long process but hopefully it's worth it when I start the job in January.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2012):

I'm not understanding why you are so nervous, you need to calm yourself down and tell the truth, just be honest with yourself. When you go for the polygraph test just make sure you only answer the questions they ask you and don't volunteer anything, the questions are going to be yes or no questions.

You've made it this far with all your interviews so I really don't believe they will hold something against as you being a child. You're 24 years old and held other jobs with no problems.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (27 September 2012):

Honeypie agony auntGood for you to own up to it. And good luck with next phase!

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A female reader, fishdish United States +, writes (27 September 2012):

fishdish agony auntI think you've definitely done the best thing- and hey your polygraph is going to come back clean!! Good luck, you're through the hard part!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2012):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I thought I would update everyone here. I had an interview with the background investigator today. He is going to set up an appointment for me to do the polygraph in the next week. There was no problem with the shirt stealing at all and I'm moving onto the next stage to take the lie detector now. I am still scared and nervous but he said it is normal.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2012):

I'm sure that will get you the job, they know they will not find a perfect person to fill the job, you got a clean record so you're good to go!!!!!!!!!

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A male reader, C. Grant Canada +, writes (7 September 2012):

C. Grant agony auntWell said!

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (7 September 2012):

Honeypie agony auntI think it was well worded and honest.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (7 September 2012):

So_Very_Confused agony auntOP sounds perfect to me.... it may not get you the job but you now have a clear conscience.

Good Job.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2012):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks for all the answers. And to one anonymous person, they will definitely be doing the lie detector test. It is part of the job application process. Right now I had to fill out my background history report which was about the size of a small book. In it is where they asked if I had ever shoplifted. I followed most of your advice and owned up to it. They had a page where you could write and explain why it happened and to give as much detail as possible. This is what I wrote-

When I was the age of 15 or 16 I made the regrettable decision to steal a shirt from Hechts. I was with a friend who said she had done it before and it's no big deal. It was a brown tank top that I hid in my bag and got away with it. I was deeply bothered by this, I was raised that shoplifting is the lowest a person can go. I gave the shirt to goodwill as I could never wear it. I have never stolen anything else nor would I ever again.

Thoughts? I have to turn this book in next thursday so I will find out after that. If they contact me to do the polygraph then they were okay with my background check and history. Which btw I have never done or been around any drugs, any crime, or any bad driving record. I figure if they don't hire me then it wasn't meant to be. I can't change what I did when I was 15.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2012):

There's not one perfect person on the face of this earth even if they haven't stole anything, they have lied or cheated which is just as bad. If you don't get the job because of something you did stupid as a teenager then they wont be able to fill that job because we all have done stupid stuff as teenagers, don't want to call any names but look at some of your TV court judges like G.M.

tell you everytime he come on, tells what he did as a kid like in and out of jail and look at him now, he's a big time judge so people changed.

If they went back and gave everybody a lie test, they would have to shut every business down in this whole world.

Like I told you in my earily post relax and calm yourself down, you have no juvenile record, you past the drug test.

After the test they will allow you to explain yourself.

He that has never sin cast the first stone.

I truly beleive if you're honest you have nothing to worry about and will post to let us know you got the job.

where I work most people don't past the drug test.

Wish you the very best.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2012):

I defy anyone to say they have never stolen anything-just a pen from work a telephone call they should have paid for-a bus ride etc .

DONT tell them forget about it-youve not done anything else since so put it behind you and dont lose the job!!!!

Its hardly likely they will do a lie detector test-if you go for an interview stop worrying THAT will stop you from getting the job-look forward

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (7 September 2012):

Honeypie agony auntI agree with C. Grant. Be 100% honest. I'm PRETTY sure they have seen/heard it before. Owning up to past mistakes I would think is better then having a polygraph that shows deceit.

Everyone has done something in their life they aren't proud off, whether it was illegal or immoral.

Good luck!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2012):

Most people do steal at some point of their lives, especially in childhood. I stole books from a library. It's wrong, for sure, but not abnormal.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2012):

I'm in my 60s, when I was 12 years old my cousin and I stole a watermelon from our neighbor watermelon patch on a saturday evening and that sunday morning our neighbor told everybody in sunday school we stole a watermelon from their patch so that was enough for me.

You're not the only one that have stole something, you're be suprise to know the people that have stole something including the person that's giving you the test so I think you are stressing yourself out over nothing for something you did stupid at a teenager, sweetheart you have nothing to worry about, so relax and be honest, you want to past the polygraph test not fail the test, it they ask you have you ever stole something say yes because you have, it they ask you have you ever shoplift say yes because you have, if you say no, lights will light up everywhere so stop working your nerves up to fail the test, after you take the test they will give you a chance to explain yourself about the shoplifting and on the other hand that may not even matter to them since you do not have a juvenile record, if you lie you will fail the test but if you're truefull you will past the test, honesty is the best policy and those without sin cast the first stone.

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A male reader, JustHelpinAgain Canada +, writes (7 September 2012):

Tricky question. Many people could get away with this because they have forgotten it and it is so insignificant that they will show no physical response if asked about it. You on the other hand would break out in a cold sweat with your pulse going through the roof. They will think you were in on a major bank heist!!

Just be honest. No it wasn't a real bad thing you did, probably most people did something like that. Just don't obsess on it. Just say you tried it once as a kid because it was what everyone was doing but you realised it was wrong and felt bad about it and never tried again. You could add you wished you had taken the shirt back!

Good luck.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2012):

I stole something as a little kid and I learned my lesson. Never stole again.

Also, you could mention the margin of error in human interpretation of the technology used to detect lies if they happen to reject you on those grounds alone.

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A female reader, fishdish United States +, writes (7 September 2012):

fishdish agony auntI don't think it's the most unusual thing to steal at a young age, but you shouldn't minimize it. It's best to just say it happened, you were young and ignorant and you would never consider doing that again. Way I see it, what you did as a teen won't cost you the job..your lying could.

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A female reader, Atsweet1 United States +, writes (7 September 2012):

Atsweet1 agony auntlol I told truth and didn't get the police job. Lie is your best bet. My mom told me too how the game goes. Really don't confess

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A male reader, C. Grant Canada +, writes (7 September 2012):

C. Grant agony auntI suppose there are different levels of dishonesty, and I would imagine that most people have failed at one point or another to be perfect. Being given too much change at a store, for example, and not saying anything. But actually, actively stealing something, while not super uncommon, is at a different level from not correcting a cashier's error. It's not horrible, but it's hardly commendable.

Lie detectors work on the principle of detecting stress. If you're stressed about having shoplifted, or stressed about being found out about having shoplifted, the polygraph will pick it up. The only way to brazen it out is to not care that you're lying. And it doesn't sound, from what you've written, that you can do that.

Personally I'd throw myself on my sword and fess up. The job is with a police department -- they may very well decide that someone who ever stole isn't suitable. Or they may look past a youthful indescretion and give you credit for owning up. But a questionable polygraph? I bet that would be something they'd have more trouble with.

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