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Is she a selfish bitch? Or just messed up?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (18 October 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 18 October 2009)
A male United States age 30-35, *oshotyo writes:

Okay, so my question may not be as alerting as most, maybe even average, but i still need help, this has been stuck in my mind since april this year,

I started dating this girl in november of last year, nothin to big at first, actually just friends, long distance for a couple of months, just internet chatting, phone calls ,texting, iv known her through high school, but i never expected to fall in love with her, i really didnt, so i made the move to be near her, and we hit it off, on valentines we gave each other our v-cards, had my first prom(never got to go to any of my proms) she was 18 just graduated and i was 20, workin trying to make a way for us,

throughout the entirety of our relationship, she painted all these big ideas of us havin babies and getting married, plain and simple we were a classic luv drunk couple, new to the idea.

well, the cons of this girl is that, she was selfish and overdramatic( the birth control ), but i looked past that cuase i loved her, and she had it rough with an abusive relationship with her mother growing up, but where my problems started with her is that, one night she called me up out of the blue, accusing me of cheating on her, and givin her an STD, well iv been tested before and after and iv never had anything wrong with my nether regions, ever.

so she tells me, " dont call me, dont text me, dont write me" and that friday she threw every posession i gave her at my feet, and crying she got in her car and told me to have a nice life, and drove away from me. well for a couple of days i tried to reason with her, telling her how much i loved her, and just to come back and let us work it out, but she acted so hateful and cold to me, that i decided to leave her alone and give her, her time, so a month roles around and she calls me on my bday in may, crying she tells me that she missed me and has been in a rough state ever since, and from then on the crap hit the fan, for 2 months it was her goin from hot to cold on a daily basis, she couldnt make up her mind, she wanted me but she was afraid it be the wrong choice and that she'd be stuck with it, saying that she loved me, but not romanticly anymore, yet when we went out together she hugged me kissed me and acted like nuthin ever changed, but the next day she would start it all over again, keep me danglin on a hook,

recently up until two months ago i havent herd from her, cuase just before i had her in my grasp( or she let me think that ), she told me i had competition with this guy, this guy bein over weight and goin bald, so i said " if that my competition then he can have you" i was fed up with it.

so a couple ugly texts there afterwords from her, bein spitefull, and stuff and i havent herd anything from her in 2 months.

my question is, that i cant understand what she was thinking, is she just a selfish bitch? or does she have problems of her own to work out?

and here recently the longer i go without hearing from her, the stronger the need gets, iv been with some other girls in the meantime, but i cant shake my ex, am i obsessive?, or..what? cuz i still do love her, and i figure after enough time i can make another try at her, once i get some things striaght..

what do you think dearcupid?

View related questions: drunk, long distance, my ex, std, text

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A female reader, bitch United States +, writes (18 October 2009):

I would agree that she is unstable. She is difficult at best to have a loving caring relationship with so you should not dwell on the past and move on. I know she obviously has a piece of your heart but don't let her get the whole thing, she will destroy your heart if you keep in contact with her. I would definitely stop all contact with her. Try your hardest and in time you will forget her and find somebody who you deserve.

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (18 October 2009):

Run away from this one as fast as you can!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2009):

She does sound like a selfish mixed up bitch. Its funny how they get to you. Sensible thing to do would be to forget her. But we think with our penis's and you got the hots for her so just make the most of whatever comes your way and try not to get to burned if it turns bad.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2009):

dude?

She cheated on you. Where do you think she got the STD from?

Then she felt so guilty that she took it out on you.

Simply she isnt ready for the relationship you had and thus sabotaged it.

Then she made a further mess of it trying to make amends.

just let her go. Its over

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