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female
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*tonePrincess
writes: Why is oral sex considered inter course? This is a question my friend asked me after she had given a guy a Blow job. But isn't this kind of the breakipoint between fooling around and sex? I wanted to tell her,"Hun, I think you just lost your virginity by going to far." But didn't have the heart. Is this losing virginhood, should I tell her? I'm scared this guys going to get her pregnant. He's 25, she's 17. He thinks at 18 she will sleep with him. He's made her think oral sex is okay. Am I over reacting? Should I tell her? If I do I'm afraid she'll just go and have sex.
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male
reader, ourchosenpaths +, writes (7 February 2006):
 According to current beliefs, your friend is still a virgin in the sense she hasn't had REAL sex. It's gross that some 25 year old is preying on young girls. According to the bible, however, any penetration into any orafice of a womans body is sodomy, unless it's procreational sex, and sodomy is more religiously frowned upon.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2006): - she WAS guilt tripped into to it by him saying ,You know I've had sex before and you not giving it to me makes it hard. Than he flirts with her sister who offers him sex, right in front OF HER! So I know I can't make her understand, that was never the question, but should I talk to her about it and let her know some of the things this guy is doing?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2006): I admidt I'm might be acting over protective, but she's a bit innocent and I know this jerk, he'll promise the world to her, take her and leave. I want to talk to her, but didn't wish to meddel in her affairs. We've been friends all our lives, and she's never really made good decisions. I'm just watching out for her. She's only been with this guy FOR A FEW WEEKS,why she did this with him so fast and not any others is because he buys her things and tells her it doesn't matter I'll marry you.
Thank you all for your answers, you've been a help.
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reader, Horseshowmama +, writes (13 January 2006):
Oral Sex is a "sexual act", your friend needs to dump this child molester and find a decent boy her own age. Not that a 17 year old boy wouldnt love a BJ either but there are other concerns besides unwanted pregnacy. Have your friend do some research on oral syphillis, gonorrhea, herpes, hpv virus and others. Sexually transmitted diseases are very serious conditions, sometime something a little as what you might think is a fever blister or a small mouth ulcer may just turn out to be worse and will spread like wild fire.
anyway, no your friend has not lost her virginity, and needs to keep her virginity as long as possible. But I cant help but wonder, what did the "boy" do to please your friend? or was giving him a BJ pleasure enough.
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A
female
reader, Angel ron +, writes (13 January 2006):
 nonesense its only foreplay.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (13 January 2006):
 For the record, obliviously oral sex is sex not just a "breaking point", hence the name, duh. But more to the point, you sound like a Nosey Nancy to me. Your friend’s sex life should be no concern of yours. Tell your friend about this column if she has any questions, worries, or concerns about HER OWN sex life.
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A
male
reader, harshbutfair  +, writes (13 January 2006):
 This is one that Bill Clinton and the rest of the world has been puzzling about. Is it intercourse? Probably. Has she lost her virginity? No. Anyway, who cares? Why is your friend's virginity any of your business? She could be banging a bus of blacks up the butt for all you know... I don't see how you became her personal chastity belt?
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A
female
reader, purrfectionist84 +, writes (13 January 2006):
 No, oral sex isn't intercourse. Intercourse, by conventional definition, entails the insertion of a penis into the vagina. Your friend's virginity is still intact.
Your friend is 17-years-old and hopefully capable of making her own decisions about her body. The guy did not force her to perform oral sex on him, now did he? As long as she consented to it, then there's not much that can be done about it. Oral sex IS okay if both people are into it, and one person hasn't forced or coerced the other into engaging in it.
I can see your concern with the age difference between your friend and the guy who she was fooling around with, but what makes you think that he will get her pregnant? Doesn't she have any knowledge of birth control? Don't you trust her to make the right decision on her own?
Please don't take this the wrong way, but you sound more like a paranoid parent than a concerned friend. Your friend needs to make her own decisions and learn from her own mistakes. As long as this guy isn't hurting her, then it would be best for you to step back a bit and let her have control over her own life.
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