A
female
age
30-35,
*lshleyg
writes:I am 19 years old, I graduated high school last year. There has always been a very strong attraction between a teacher at my school (30 years old) and me. My friends would always bug me about how he liked me, but I never told them that I was in love with him. Before graduation he gave me a letter saying how amazing I was and he was glad he'd gotten to know me. It was professional and it did not insinuate anything sexual between us. Last summer, after graduation, he told me he loves me and then we kissed. I don't know if this is wrong and whether it would be completely immoral to take it any further with him. Thoughts? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, LiveAnnLearn  +, writes (10 September 2010):
 "there's mutual feelings and it's legal to have a relationship with him. Go for it, girl!" - couldn't agree more;)
A
male
reader, Bobito  +, writes (10 September 2010):
 I find it funny how some people focus on his letter. Was it unprofessional? It doesn't matter! What matters, here, is that there's mutual feelings and that it's legal to have a relationship with him. Go for it, girl!
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A
female
reader, JGSM  +, writes (6 September 2010):
 I understand you completely... and just like me, who has been in the same situation must say that you should follow your heart and give it a try. Just as long as it feels like it's both of your decision and not only his, like you are being used. A naive person can't see the difference... but I hope and think that you will. For me it worked out good. This man, who actually was 12 years older than me is not the only older man I've dated. And for us I had the time of my life and learned alot. It was an amazing time of my life and I don't regret it with this one, or the last one. I am very independent and know what I want. That's important. Because everything you do makes you who you are, practice creates knowledge. And at least for me younger boys does not interest me at all... so that's out of the question. Don't like them physically or mentally.
Good Luck!
/S
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2010): Like the other person said, it's legal, and it may seem weird now, but if you really love each other it will work out. I go to a Christian school, and a student at my school married one of her teachers like, 15 years ago, and they're very happy now.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2010): You are 19 = legal, and if you are not in high school anymore then, it is not unprofessional of him to tell you he likes you, or love. Sure he wants you. If you want him, then have fun, use a condom, and enjoy it....
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A
female
reader, Phoebe Halliwell +, writes (4 September 2010):
 It was unprofessional of him to give you that letter. Mostly girls have a bit of a crush on older male teachers because they're dominant, powerful, in control, and that's something that is attractive to younger girls. 11 years is a big age gap, especially when you're so young. You've got loads of experiences you're yet to have, and he's in a place where that stage of his life is behind him. I wouldn't carry on seeing him, no matter how strong the attraction is. Try finding someone your own age, or at least nearer. If in a few years you still are pining for him, maybe consider contacting him. But for now, find someone closer to your own age, someone you can share similar experiences with like going to University or travelling or partying, even. Chances are you're more likely to relate to someone who's in the same place in their life as you are in yours. Not someone who's already been there and done that.
Have fun!
xxx
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A
male
reader, CharmedCupid +, writes (4 September 2010):
 Well,being strictly prefessional,I do believe that it is not wise to date him. Although I do not know you nor do I know him,I am still against it,but if for some unknown reason you feel happy with him,I do do employ you to see reason,the age difference,and probably because you are young and rather attractive. Then again though I have not seen you,all women are. Just please be cautionate and make the correct decisions :) xxx
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A
male
reader, bma.com +, writes (4 September 2010):
 Let the kiss be it and haul butt. Let him find someone more his own age (sick) Most cases like this involves a girl's longing love that she never got from her father.And some men prey upon this,He will buy you anything your heart desires but that will end too one day after he hasyou in his life. And most cases the older man will become extremly jealous over u and you will be locked in his prison for life, Please be careful.Runn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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