A
female
age
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anonymous
writes: is it normal for married men to watch love making videos on the internet? espeically when they don't make love to their wifes that offten. even if the wife is willing to make love. would you say it is time to leave them?troubled,
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male
reader, PeterPan  +, writes (19 June 2009):
 Yeah, I would say it's rather normal. We guys are "confused" about our sexuality sometimes (so-called society's opinions are the primary source of that confusion)... and frankly, it's sometimes easier to get our sexual satisfaction from an dispassionate source -- the video doesn't care if you watch or not. Add to that the fact that men are generally "visually stimulated" creatures. In the end, he gets his relief without the associated emotional connections. But, the point is that it's not you, or a reflection of you... or even an expression of the love and affection he has for you. Maybe it's also good to add that men can tend to separate the act of love (the sexual side of life) and being in love or loving (the compassionate, caring side).
Bottom line here is that maybe you need to have this conversation with him. It's not unnatural for a man to turn to pornography (especially since you can find it EVERYWHERE). But, if you feel it's getting out of hand or he's ignoring you and your concerns... that's a problem. Has he somehow got it in his head that he needs to turn to the internet before turning to you?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2009): "Love making videos" my buttox.. There's nothing loving in those videos. Anyway.. Marraige is a strong committment and it's supposed to last.. forever. There's not much information here, as to how hard you've tried, how many other problems there are in your marraiage, how you feel about him besides this point, and how he feels about you. But if this is the only issue going on, then you should try to help it before you end your marraige. That's a big thing to do. Porn is often addictive to it's veiwer and hard to turn off once it gets turned on. It's sad, it makes people feel like crap-if you don't believe me, search the pornography section of this site- it ruins relationship, lowers selfesteem, but dont' get me wrong, a lot of couples love the stuff. It still baffles me that our world has evolved into something which ends marraiges from things such as porn: not saying that women should get over it and men should just stop; but that thigns have really gotten to that point. That we went from being a slut because we showed our ankles to being "hot" when we let out tits hang out. Sad. Try to fix it if you've not already tried hard. I think there are counseling sessions for these types of porn addictions. But if this is just another in the multitude of issues you two have, then do what makes you happy for the rest of your life. And if that's divroce, then i guess that's what it is, ~SY.
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A
female
reader, bobbles32 +, writes (19 June 2009):
 I don't know.. do you love your wife?
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