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Is it possible to fulfill his fantasy but keep him out of it?

Tagged as: Sex, Three is a crowd<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (28 October 2009) 5 Answers - (Newest, 2 November 2009)
A female United States age 51-59, *asou812 writes:

Dear Cupid.

I have been in a relationship with a wounderful man, I love him very much. We should have met years ago! He is very much into women. matter of fact he makes comments often. i say he is infatuated. That is ok to a point, sure I tend to get a little upset. But i know he is coming home with me. Anyhow, recently we have had conversations, and he states how he would luv to watch two girls together. I am assuming he wants to join. Now i know this may sound stingy, but i would do this, but i would not want him to join, I would not and could not think or even see him getting it on with another woman. I would like to fill his fantasy, but not let him join. Help!

Yours Truely

wimemedineme69me

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A female reader, basou812 United States +, writes (2 November 2009):

basou812 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I really appreciate all the input. That is really great that we all tend to lookout for one another. Alot of the suggestions and pointers have helped me decide. That is not to fulfill bringing in someone for a threesum. I will admit....i wouldnt mind another female. Cuz i feel that in the ways of kissing...touching...caressing...we know what we each want. MMMMM.........

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A female reader, Sugarbuns Australia +, writes (29 October 2009):

Sugarbuns agony auntHe will join in. You'd be better off not to go there. It could end badly. Best to fulfill one of his other fantasies (men have endless amounts). Perhaps you could take up belly dancing lessons, or learn how to pole dance and then give him a private show. It's every man's fantasy to see (and be with) two chicks at the same time, but a wise woman knows it's better to leave some things in the fantasy world. You wouldn't feed your precious child 6 candy bars, 4 sodas and 2 ice cream cones for dinner, but it is the desire of every child to overindulge on sweet treats. Some things should never become a reality.

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A female reader, AskLadyJuJu United States +, writes (28 October 2009):

AskLadyJuJu agony auntwell i have to disagree with caring guy.. i mean it can be harmful so u have to be careful but if he told you its for a reason. he probably told you because he wants an adventure and somethin new.. if he said he just wants to watch then just go as far as watchin and when the other girl leaves then you get it on with him.. my boyfriend wants to do the samething he just likes the fact that he can watch his girl and another girl getting it on its a turn on he says. its better then him cheating with someone behind your back just make sure its with a girl who wont get attached and continue ..and dont let him join! if you let him join it wont be the same.. i told my boyfriend hes not joining but he can fuck me and watch but thats the farthest hes getting....

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (28 October 2009):

I wouldn't go down this route. Threesomes and partners doing this has often ended in heartache. If he joins in, you'll end up feeling used and hurt, and if he doesn't join in, he'll feel like he's been cheated. I would suggest that you don't do this. Try and explore other fantasies, and perhaps make sure he's actually focusing on you and not other women as well. Don't allow yourself to be second best.

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A male reader, empty-1 United States +, writes (28 October 2009):

I would suggest that he very well may have a similar problem with seeing you with another person. Fantasy sometimes is just that, fantasy, and not meant to become reality.

If you could handle being with someone else in front of him, and he could handle seeing it, why not let him join? Make it about pleasing you. He only touches you, she only touches you, you touch whomever you want.

Personally, and from experience, I would suggest you don't go down that path at all. It's an invitation for trouble of one sort or another.

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