A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:About a week ago I found out my boyfriend cheated on me. I wrote another post regarding this, but now I need so more help.During last week we had no contact at all. It was killing me inside, but I knew I had to be strong. I miss him every single day and every single second, but I always stopped myself from dialing his number when I picked up the phone.I always sat here wondering, does he miss me? How does he really feel? Well today I got all the answers I needed. He finally called me today. He told me he felt really bad about what happened and I asked him why he didn't tell me sooner that he cheated on me and he said he didn't want to hurt me. He told me he was sorry and how he is very sad about all of this and then he told me he loved me and I told him not to say it but he said, "I can't help it"These words dig into my heart, he seems so sincere. I love him with my whole heart, and I wonder if we can make this work. Is it possible this will make us stronger?What do I do? I mean can't I forgive him if he promises me he will never do it again?I really need some words of widsom.. I mean, people cheat all the time and they get tooken back, theres always a risk that they will do it again.. but theres also a good chance they won't.Help me out.
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female
reader, aphexinfinite  +, writes (20 July 2009):
 some people cheat once and learn their mistake whilst most do it more than once. you can make this relationship work a till he cheats again or b he doesnt cheat. but the big word that decides it all is trust. would you be able to trust him since he has cheated ? trust plays alot in a relationship and we take it for granted. if you can trust him then i cant see why it wont work. but at the same time just be careful is all encase he cheats again im not say check all the time but be weary. im against cheaters and would rather be with someone who is faithful to the bitter end and not someone who cant keep it in their pants they deserve the curb. its up to you but your questioning it so that makes me think that you want to give him a chance but you dont at the same time. if you really love him then give him a second chance atleast then you wont regret it. but just remember you take this relationship on its for the good and the bad. good luck with your choices. aphex xx
A
male
reader, GrimmReality  +, writes (20 July 2009):
 Sure you can forgive him...at your own risk.
People know exactly what they are doing when they cheat. I don't care if your 16 or 60. It is a conscious decision and it is selfish and disrespectful in the extreme. He'll tell you want you want to hear. Apparently he is because you are practically justifying him doing it. "If he promises to npt do it again"?
Actions not words young lady. ACTIONS NOT WORDS. ONLY ACTIONS COUNT ON HIS PART NOW!
best of luck, I am not going to fault you for wanting to forgive him, for you are young. But will you forgive him when he does it again? If he knows you will take him back, then he has no more fear of you dumping him. So when it does happen and you are back here writing the same post in 6 months, don't say I didn't warn you.
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