A
male
age
30-35,
*erdyGuy
writes:Dear whoever reads this,I have a girlfriend, we've been dating for 1.5 years and we're planning to get serious. Not long ago she invited me to her friends' place to hang over. It was the first time I got to know them, she kept the distance between us for more than a year for some reason. The hosts were recently married, and apart from the guy, there were no other guys there, only girls. We became friends with the guy, he's a cool fellow, nice, funny, we started to mate apart from these meetings and have a really good time. Not long ago he got drunk and told me, he was actually her ex. "Than she has fine exes, what can I say?" - I responded. "I doubt so," - he said, - "I'll tell you every little thing about them."I stopped him. Was this the right decision? I'm totally okay with him being her ex, but is this right that I don't want to know anything about her life except from what she tells me herself?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2012): You did the right thing. But you still don't like the smell of this, do you? Well you are right not to like it.If she was still in contact and friendly with an ex-BF, then you would think you had the right to know, wouldn't you? That is exactly what she has been doing by keeping her sexual history with this "friend" a secret from you. She has kept it a secret that she was still in contact with a past partner. That is a violation of your rights as her current partner. You had the right to know the whole story because there was a sexual history and this guy was still in her life today.
A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (23 December 2012):
 You absolutely did the right thing. Her ex just wanted to gossip and you turned him down with class.
Well done. Don't second guess yourself.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 December 2012): Yes absolutely - you showed her a lot of respect by doing this. Well done!
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A
male
reader, Darrell Goodliffe  +, writes (23 December 2012):
 On balance, id probably say its right. You have to trust your partner and besides what is in the past is in the past, I really dont see much point raking over her past relationships, it can only cause problems and a slight loss of perspective on your part probably. Maybe I am a horribly jaded cynic but I cant help but be suspicious of the motives of your new found friend for wanting to reveal this information. Just be advised everybody has their own agenda. You did the right thing, you trusted and respected your partner, so well done :)
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