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Is he cheating or just really busy?

Tagged as: Age differences, Cheating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (23 September 2013) 5 Answers - (Newest, 24 September 2013)
A female Canada age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Hello ok I had met this guy who is younger than I am, he is 31, I am 40. He seems like a nice guy and we would talk on the phone pretty much every day. He also kept bugging me about when I would take the Greyhound to meet him. I kept putting it off because things would come up or I would be busy. Now whenever I try to phone him it always says that his phone is busy. Whenever I do finally get a hold of him he says he is busy. Recently I finally got ahold of him and he said he was busy because he went away with his father for a week. Now I am lucky if I talk to him once a week and he still bugs me about when I am going to travel down to meet him. Every time I try to phone him it is busy. Has he just lost interest or is he cheating on me or is he just really busy???

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A male reader, GentleGiant Canada +, writes (24 September 2013):

Relationships are about giving and taking and sharing. Tell this potential to get on the bus himself and meet you half-way somewhere where you two can get together and get to know each other better. Ask him if he is seeing anybody? There is no law against that.If he just isnt believable then he is just a bullshitter and you be better off forgetting about him. Good-luck.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (23 September 2013):

Honeypie agony auntMy thought is this, if he wanted to see you so badly WHY hadn't he come around to see YOU? Why do YOU have the be the one to travel?

Also, if he keeps being busy when you try and talk, then he is stringing you along.

I also think there is a reason you haven't been on that bus yet and it's not the ones you mention. I don't think you are really that keen on him.

Neither of you sound really gun-ho on meeting up.

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A female reader, StephJayne United Kingdom +, writes (23 September 2013):

StephJayne agony auntAs said before, I don't think he is cheating on you as there is no relationship between you two yet!

Tell him how you feel, if when you get a chance to on the phone, if not, text him. Explain how you feel. He may genuinely be busy and as most of us do, will get into our head a negative thought and stick with it.

You'll know where you're both at if you speak to him, and understand where his feelings are for you

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (23 September 2013):

Send him a text, explain that you really want to get to know him a little before traveling down .. It's a long way and you need to feel comfortable .. Say to him you can feel his interest has wained a little and maybe he's not putting all his eggs in one basket , tell him that's fine as you are doing the same .. Tell him a gentlemen always travels to see the girl first so if he wants to make plans to travel to you end of next month stay in a hotel/motel thing then you'll be more than happy to show him the sites ..

Here the thing there is no sexual contact other than a kiss ... That's it nada !!

You show him the sites go to dinner dancing cinema but he goes crack to the motel .. If he is unwilling to do this .. Draw a hasty line under him and move on sweetie ..

Take care . X

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A female reader, llifton United States +, writes (23 September 2013):

llifton agony auntI don't think he could be classified as cheating, as you two aren't in a proper relationship. at least that's how it sounds to me.

Maybe he liked you but got tired of waiting to meet. Or perhaps he met someone else in the meantime who he is now seeing?

I would probably call this a lost cause. I'd put some distance between you and him.

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