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Is being too fast rude?

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (21 March 2017) 5 Answers - (Newest, 24 March 2017)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Would you consider it rude if a guy gets off within two minutes if it's the first couple of times you've done anything together?

I started dating a guy a couple months ago and we started taking out to the next level recently. So far we've done it twice and each time he came really fast. I would think if a guy really liked a girl he would attempt to impress her at least some what early on. Other then that he's been consistent and even clingy.

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (24 March 2017):

chigirl agony auntI would take it as a complement. You're so hot, he's unable to carry on for longer.

Besides this, what his body does is not really so much of a choice. The body has a mind of it's own. Some men take hours and hours to climax. But the average time for intercourse is something like 2-5 minutes, if I remember correctly. It's just how most men work, they aren't designed for hours and hours of intense pleasure. If you want things to last longer, wait with intercourse and play with each other in other ways. There are many ways to use fingers and tongue, and many body parts to explore with your mouth. Many who give a lot of pleasure. Then use intercourse as a neat way to "wrap it up" when you are satisfied, sort of like the cherry on top.

Also, he is probably just super excited to have sex with you. You're new. It's exciting. With time he will probably be able to control himself more and last longer.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2017):

I laughed to myself when i saw Honeypies use of caps when she stated some guys have GREAT stamina....sounds like plenty of actual past experience!!

Anyway...I agree with the other answers..clingy implies insecurity...being a quick draw mcgraw.. i wouldnt tell him thats its a issue for you, but instead try to slow things down after you get in bed..I'll bet you that he feels anxiety that hes gonna cum fast, which of course makes things worse...only get in bed when your both really chilled out,maybe after ONE drink, and then SLOW HIM DOWN..no quick penetration..its not a race to the finish line..

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (21 March 2017):

Honeypie agony auntI agree with Andie too.

Some guys have GREAT stamina, some don't. Some have it some of the time and other times they are a 2-minute man.

I don't think the amount of TIME he lasts equals to how much he likes the girl, I think the AMOUNT of EFFORT he puts into HER pleasure BEFORE or AFTER the climax shows a LOT more about him.

Now if he just does a wham-bam-thank you ma'am in 2 minutes and totally disregard your needs... YOU need to speak up. Not to tell him to "LAST" longer but to GIVE please as much as he seems to TAKE pleasure.

As for being clingy... Eekk not a fan. It makes me think they are insecure.

If you CAN have sex with this guy, you CAN talk about sex with him. Like, tell him that YOU would like more foreplay or after play. If he ignores your needs, maybe he isn't a good match for you sexually or he is not willing to LEARN. Not a good trait either.

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A male reader, Fatherly Advice United States + , writes (21 March 2017):

Fatherly Advice agony auntGood Reply Andie! Being considerate is the important thing.

There are some possible reasons for a quick finish. Perhaps he is just very turned on by you. Perhaps he has trained himself to be quick through excessive masturbation. Or Maybe it has just been a long time for him. He may be unable to impress you.

Being too slow is also rude.

On the other hand Clingy is not a good thing.

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom +, writes (21 March 2017):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntUm.... I think it's irrational to expect someone to "last longer" - the body does what it does when it does it. As long as they still pay attention to the other person's pleasure, even when they're finished.

I wouldn't be impressed by lasting longer - I'd be impressed by wanting to make me feel good too.

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