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I'm uncomfortable since I discovered that my boyfriend has an interest in very young girls!

Tagged as: Dating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (16 September 2012) 5 Answers - (Newest, 17 September 2012)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

So, straight to the point. I looked at my boyfriends phone before and in his picture album there were naked pictures of this girl he had sexual relationship with, which I get, it's old and all but you shouldn't have them while you are in a new relationship BUT there were pictures of which looked like a party and pictures of zoomed in to there butts of what look like to be 13 year old girls. Like he took pictures of this young girl a lot, she was in her bathing suit. I confronted him and he deleted him and that was the end of that conversation. Now, I can't picture him being into younger girls or anything or him harming them but it's still kind of scary. Just recently I went in his phone history and you know men are men and they look up there porn...but he typed in on google "young thirteen year old girls" and then typed in "young jailbait"...WTF? My sister is 13 years old and I was going to have her sleepover with her friends but now I'm kind of scared. This isn't right. I'm pregnant with his son. Thank god it's not a girl but...what if....what do I do? Comfront him again? He knows how I feel about it because I have specifically said for a guy his age it's disgusting and creepy to have pictures like that, I mean I went all out on him. But now I don't think he even took it seriously. I can't look at him the same..and today we are painting our sons nursery...I'm just uncomfortable....

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A female reader, Anonymous 123 Italy +, writes (17 September 2012):

Anonymous 123 agony auntGe out of your relationship as soon as you can! There is something very wrong about this guy and you should follow your instincts. This is not the person who you should be planning your life with; as another aunt said, what if your next child is a girl? What if your younger sister comes over and he eyes her in a disgusting way? This is appalling! Leave him right now, forget the nursery, this man is a pedophile!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (16 September 2012):

You're actually in a relationship with a potential pedophile, you need to get away from him, period! Do not allow your sister and her friends to stay over at your house, you would be putting each and every one of them at risk. Even though you're pregnant with a boy, I would not advise bringing up any child around this guy whatsoever.

If he ends up getting arrested over the content on his phone and computer, you could end up in trouble too for knowing about it and not reporting him. I know that sounds harsh because you don't want to shop your boyfriend to the police, but that is how the law works.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (16 September 2012):

Honeypie agony auntThe girls he looks at on the internet might LOOK you but be legal however, if his taste run in pre-adolescent children I would worry about many things, your sister being the first item on that list.

Secondly, if THAT is what he likes what about you? Are you just a cover?

Did he EVER give you an explanation for having KIDS/ KIDDIE porn on the phone? Or does he assume that since he got you knocked up you are willing to look the other way?

I really think you need to re-think this guy and this relationship - baby on the way or not. What if the next child is a girl?

I think YOU need to get your ducks in a row. 1. find a place to live, get a job so you can support your child and I think you need to document EVERYTHING.

Please listen to your gut.

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States +, writes (16 September 2012):

Tisha-1 agony auntYour boyfriend is going to wind up in jail if he is making or downloading images of children in a sexualized context.

You don't need to confront him again, you need to separate from him immediately and discuss it with the attorney you are going to hire to ensure your son will receive child support from him. The attorney should be able to provide some guidance as well.

I don't understand how you can be involved in painting a nursery when you know that something is so off-kilter with this guy. Get out of there, get to a place of safety and go here for some help: http://www.stopitnow.org/advice-column

Your instincts are telling you something is wrong; he's making images of girls and is looking for underage (ILLEGAL!) images of child pornography. Hello? Get out of there!

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A female reader, BondGirl72 United States +, writes (16 September 2012):

BondGirl72 agony auntIf he's had pictures on his computer then he is interested in young girls. People don't put pictures like that on a computer unless there is an issue with it. I would make arrangements to move out if you live with him, and I would seriously keep my distance. I would not want a son or daughter around him with this kind of perversion.

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