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I'm told I'm not fat and I'm stunning, so why no boyfriend? I'm thinking a diet will sort it all out.

Tagged as: Dating, Health, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (16 September 2009) 8 Answers - (Newest, 18 September 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 26-29, *ate_123 writes:

hey right well this is a weird question !

i want to know what to do? i would say i am fat but everyone says im not and i would say im ugly but every says im stunning and i want to loose weight! becouse i am 15 and never once had a boyfrind so if peaple say i am stunning funny kind and have a bubbly persanality, then the only reason i cant get a boyfreind is becouse i am fat basically. so what do i do about it ? i think i should just go on a BIG diet maybe that will sort it out ?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 September 2009):

Oh ffs, if you are told that you aren' fat why the **** would you go on a diet, guys don't want to go out with a skeleton . Plus anyways i know fat people who do have boyfriends , so do most people!!!!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2009):

If people say you are stunning then you are. Believe it! Confidence is the most attractive quality. A lot of people say I'm stunning, but when I was 15 I didn't believe them... As far as I knew, no boy had ever liked me so how could I be stunning, right? I got my first boyfriend at 16, now I'm 24 and single at the moment with a very confusing 8 guys who want to go out with me. Just be patient and don't do any dieting that will stuff up your body for life. I'm a biochemist and I can tell you that any diet (other than eating healthy, balanced meals) is going to be bad for you in the long run. If you skip any meals, that slows down your body's metabolism (which means it takes longer to process your food and more gets turned to fat) and also makes your body think food is difficult to come by, so it starts to store more fat to keep energy supplies in case it doesn't get enough later.

I also wanted to mention that maybe guys at 15 lack the confidence to approach you. They may think you're out of their league and probably already have someone better that you're interested in or already dating.

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A female reader, Blod United Kingdom +, writes (16 September 2009):

Blod agony auntA diet is not going to get you a boyfriend. I know plenty of gorgeous, pretty, SLIM girls who are older than you and are single and never had a bf.

You're 15. You're in your teens, during puberty and adolesence. As you get older your body will settle, your emotions, hormones, weight and everything else too. And that is when you're most likely to find yourself your perfect boyfriend that will love you for who you are, not for how much you weigh.

So honestly, stuff this diet idea. It's not healthy to be on a diet in your teens anyway.

May I also add that a LOT of lads actually prefer curvy girls rather than skinny ones as they look more feminine. I don't think it's your weight that's stopping you from having a bf. It's probably not meant to be right now. So wait a little, and trust me, when you're meant to have a bf he'll come and find you. X

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A female reader, Lola1 Canada +, writes (16 September 2009):

Lola1 agony aunterr... please allow me to clarify - DIETS are not healthy, but balanced and nutritious EATING PLANS are beneficial to everyone!

oops!

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A female reader, Lola1 Canada +, writes (16 September 2009):

Lola1 agony auntI ALWAYS advise against diets - whether you are still growing or not. A healthy diet is beneficial for everyone. If you chose healthy foods and exercise regularly (but do not obsess about it), then you will be perfect regardless of your size or shape.

Sexiness is not related to body shape. It is related to self-esteem. Improve your idea of inner worth and the world will be your oyster. Trust me... on this I know my stuff. ;-)

I can remember being your age and watching my friends have boyfriends while I didn't. It was at about 15 or so that I had my first one. And frankly, after that I had many admirers.

Give yourself time and use that time to improve your opinion of yourself.

Good luck.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (16 September 2009):

About going on a BIG DIET. Don't do it. You're still growing and developing and your body needs fuel to do that.

Try to eat less fried foods and snackey stuff and eat more fruits and vegetables, and high fiber foods, like nuts, and legumes for example....in moderation those foods fill you up and stave off hunger. Always, always eat a good breakfast, you will be less likely to overeat later in the day.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (16 September 2009):

http://kidshealth.org/teen/food_fitness/problems/body_image.html

Read the article above, I think it will help you.

Having a boyfriend is not a measure of your self worth or even your physical beauty because beauty is in the eye of the beholder and you are your own person, some boy is not validation of how great you are.

You will have plenty of boyfriends later on, right now it is a lot more fun and you have a lot less drama, if you have boys that are friends, not boyfriends. Focus on yourself and achieving your owd educational goals and get interested in something. Interesting people attract other interesting people.

Take care.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (16 September 2009):

Quit putting yourself down. Sounds like you are your worst enemy.

A lot of people don't start dating until they are older; my daughter didn't and she has several boyfriends since then.

I think it is premature to start worrying.

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