A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:me and my husband have recently got divorced for the simple reason of we just drifted apart and thought we'd be better off as friends. I was his first and he was mine we have been best friends since infants school so we know each other very well. I do still love him but only as a friend and we are back like we used to be at school we do alot of things together and are very close friends but nothing moe. He had a gf but they seperated and i have a bf. Now hes always been ok with me and my ex husband being friends and they get on to a certain extent when they have too. It was one of the first things i told him when i met him that i was divorced but we have stayed close friends and the reason for the divorce. But recently he seems to be getting really moody when ever i do anything with him or even see him. I don's see the problem we have a daughter together and she still goes over there and sees him as many times as she wnats whether she goes there or he is here and sometimes i go with her because hes my friend and i want to see him. Theres only ever been him and my other best friends karen who i tell everything to and who really know me well. I've just had enough of my bf's attitude towards my ex husband. yes i can understand what he may be thinking that i might go back to him but i've told him so many times i won't because i don't wnat to. its getting to the point where i'm having to avoid seeing him. I have told my ex husband and he said "do whats best and what you feels right, don't put your relationship at risk just for seeing me, you'll still see me because he can't stop you and he definately can't stop sarah(our daughter) see me" "i don't want to stop seeing you but it'd be nice if we could just all get alone. As far as my ex husband was concerned they were ok. I just don't know what to do, when i was dicussing this with my ex i just burst into tears because hving to stop seeing him would kill me. Hes a masive part of my life, always has been and always will be! He's the one thats been there for me through everything and me and hiom have been through a hell of alot together. I just don't know what to do, its killing me! its getting to the point that i want to break up with my bf because of this. I will never stop seeing him and there will never be anything between us again, we love each other as friends nothing more! Please help!
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female
reader, baby duck + ♥, writes (23 October 2007):
You know what to do.
One of the hardest parts of breaking up with someone is focusing on the good stuff ... because no one wants to be an ungrateful clod that thinks everything in life is dismal. On the other hand, we don't break up with people because of the good stuff, do we? It's the stuff that makes the relationship not work ... sometimes we can work it out and we look back on it, saying, "Wow! That was tough! But we're so much closer now ..."
Sometimes, though, the relationship is not working, in spite of what is right. You were up front about your relationship with your ex. You've done nothing wrong. Your current bf can't live with the relationship. That does not make him a bad guy, either. It just means, sadly, that you two will probably part company.
Best wishes.
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