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I'm still in love with him even though he is cruel

Tagged as: Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (12 April 2021) 7 Answers - (Newest, 14 April 2021)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Once upon a time I liked this boy from my primary school when I was 13. I told him how I felt about him on Facebook and his response was that I have problems. But it made me fall in love with him even more. Then one day, he called me an ugly bitch with mental health problems and deleted me off Facebook after having an argument with someone. He even rejects my friend requests whenever I try to add him. The problem is that I'm not over him because I'm still I love with him. What should I do?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (14 April 2021):

You need to forget about him. He does not reciprocate your feelings and he sounds like an arse so you are better off without him. Forget him, move on.

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A female reader, Plexi Canada +, writes (13 April 2021):

Plexi agony auntSweetheart you are not in love with him......this is an obsession!!

you want him because you can't have him and you created this perfect man idea of him in your head( he would probably bore you or highly disappoint you if you two were ever "together")

Bottom line........he is not interested and is being cruel to push you away because you didn't accept his initial rejection!!! HE IS NOT INTERESTED!!!

Drop him....move on and find someone who feels about you the way you think you feel about this guy!!

Good luck OP

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2021):

"Then one day, he called me an ugly bitch with mental health problems and deleted me off Facebook after having an argument with someone. He even rejects my friend requests whenever I try to add him. The problem is that I'm not over him because I'm still I love with him. What should I do?"

Take a hint. I think he has told you pretty much what to do with your feelings.

You could seek professional counseling and find-out why you believe you love somebody who clearly doesn't even like you?

You're not a 13 year-old schoolgirl anymore. NO means NO!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2021):

You have issues to explore with a therapist if a man you hardly know calls you nasty names and rejects you repeatedly and you love him at all and EVEN MORE????

What kind of a guy can say those things? And WHY would you allow him to call you an "ugly bitch with mental health problems?" WTF? THAT IS BEYOND INHUMANE WHAT HE SAID TO YOU!!! And not just words OP. That is what he THINKS OF YOU!! Don't you want to find a guy who thinks you are BEAUTIFUL? KIND? LOVING? INTELLIGENT? THE WHOLE PACKAGE? "MENTALLY BALANCED? This man is disrespectful towards you and it seems he would be disrespectful to ALL people if he is capable of spitting out such venom!! MANY people have mental health issues, especially these days! No shame in that!!! He seems like a person who has no empathy and no heart!!! What is there to LOVE about a SCUM BUCKET DEVIL INCARNATE??????

There is something going on with you OP. I agree with Honeypie. You are obsessed with him and that is not healthy. It is time to work on yourself. Start living your life. Start doing things you love. Start meeting new people. Start finding YOU again. And do it while blocking this JERK out of your life for good.

But START WITH THERAPY. You need to start changing yourself from the inside out. Or I fear these patterns will continue repeating themselves in your life, and could escalate to a point where more pain will be involved.

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A female reader, CarrieSoa United Kingdom +, writes (13 April 2021):

CarrieSoa agony auntYou need to grow up. You are behaving like a loved up teenager and you're in your 30's for crying out loud.

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom + , writes (13 April 2021):

kenny agony auntI think you have got to let this one go. To much time has passed and you really don't know anything about him or his life now.

Accept the fact that he has deleted you, Come on OP, you don't love him.

What should you do?. Accept that he has rejected you and move on with your life and stop dwelling on past events that you have no control over.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (13 April 2021):

Honeypie agony auntProbably start by not stalking him and not reach out to him anymore.

While he was cruel, I think it's a little creepy to declare your feeling to someone you haven't known for 20 years. Don't you realize that he probably is a VERY different person than the 13-year-old boy you have in your head?

You don't LOVE him, you are obsessed and/or infatuated with him, HUGE difference. That isn't love. You don't know him.

You are in your 30's and acting like a preteen with a crush on a boyband member - grow up.

Come on, it's not hard.

Focus on you and your own life. If you do have mental health, issues WORK on those.

He isn't your friend, he rejected you. SUCK it up and let it go.

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