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I'm married but my ex boyfriend who claims he loves me keeps cancelling our dates! Why?

Tagged as: Cheating, Dating, Marriage problems, Pregnancy<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (22 September 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 22 September 2009)
A female United States age 41-50, *ulia2009 writes:

i have a complicated story, well my boyfriend and i broke up years ago cause i found out that he cheated on me and got some girl pregnant. i finished the relationship as soon as i found out. He tried to convince me that that it was not his baby but it was a lie. anyway he was convinced by his friends to stay with her and support his kids as a family but shortly moved out. i see him all the time and he still says that he loves me and want to be with me. now they have broken up and he moved out of her house and still on my case.

For me however i got married and tried to move on, i got married and have a child, i found out shortly that my husband was cheating on me and has a child outside marriage and now we are officialy separated. i still love my ex. and i would say the reason i got married was to show him the pain he caused me. whenever i see him he is all over me trying to convince me to get back with him and when we arrange a date or for him to call me it does'nt happen. i can't figure it out, please help, iam confused.

View related questions: broke up, cheated on me, move on, moved out, my ex

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A female reader, julia2009 United States +, writes (22 September 2009):

julia2009 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks Samurai girl, Mariab and Caring Guy for your helpful advice. I will try and move on, my husband was also cheating on me, i found out he had another child outside marriage and now living with another woman so he is a no no.

Even though my ex heard about me and my husband, i guess thats why he is trying his luck again. but i will try to move on.its going to be hard specially when we stay in both stay in same area and i see him around. but i will try, thanks for the advice.

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (22 September 2009):

I'm going to agree with the others. Stay away from your ex. You're only going to get hurt. Leave the past where it is. Instead, try going out and socializing. There are some good guys out there and you'll find one.

But definitely leave that ex alone. x

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A female reader, Mariab United Kingdom +, writes (22 September 2009):

Mariab agony auntI agree with Samurai Girl. You need to stay away from your ex! You cannot run back to him now that your marriage didn't work out. These men have both hurt you. How does your husband feel? Does he want to work things out or are you trying to hurt your husband back by getting with your ex. Revenge is not always the best option and sometimes it hurts the very people trying to hurt others. Please don't believe that this ex has changed just because you married someone else and taught him a lesson. Some men can't stand rejection... he would of done anything to get you to want him and now that you do... he will not be available. Be stronger than him. Good luck xx

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A female reader, samurai girl United States +, writes (22 September 2009):

samurai girl agony auntyou need to stay away from ex-bf and try to make your marriage work so your baby can have an intact family.

if this is impossible, stay away from both of these men and focus on raising your baby to be healthy and happy. take a break from relationships.

don't be confused. it's simple. they both cheated on you and once a victim, twice a volunteer...

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