A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:What do I do if the person I'm in a serious relationship with, desiring marriage mostly on their part, is 135+ lbs overweight and despite my encouraging request to my significant other to lose weight and eat healthier has done almost nothing, if anything, to try to lose any weight?
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male
reader, Jamer70  +, writes (6 July 2007):
 I agree with LauraE. If you love someone you love all of them for who and what they are. But if this causes her a health problem somethingg can be done. Why dont you suggest that you both start working out, running around your street. Jon a gym. Join a dance club?
But if you truely love her. Love all of her, not parts of her
A
female
reader, kellyO +, writes (6 July 2007):
 Hi,
Do you do it together? Perhaps u can try going with him to the gymn and cultivating the same eating habits. Make it a routine like twice a week or so..Maybe if u get involved as well it might help encourage him.
Hope this helped abit.
Goodluck.
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A
female
reader, LauraE +, writes (6 July 2007):
The virtuous reply here is to say, if you love them, love them as they are. That's true. But. If you feel this will cause a problem for you long term, then be honest with yourself now because otherwise you might be looking at divorce in the end. No one should get married if they know there is an issue that will cause trouble. It also sounds like you aren't as keen anyway, so I would put the marriage issue to one side for now. There are also the long term health issues with being 135lb over the ideal weight, so it isn't just about how you feel. There may be psychological problems which are encouraging your love to overeat and be unable to make changes. Could depression be a factor? Obviously, issuing threats is never a good idea. But try to get over the point that this is really worrying you. For health reasons and for the long-term happiness of you both, something needs to be done. Offer to be supportive in whatever would be helpful.
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A
female
reader, xlovelyx +, writes (6 July 2007):
have you asked them if there is owt wrong? is there something whats got a hold on him from the past and he wants to let go! they need you at this moment in time. i know you are only trying to help them but they are probley seeing it as a freat. explain to him how you feel and tell him the only freat he has is him self. he needs professial help as he can come really ill with this and his heart can slow down if he dont take a step back and look at what they are doing to them selfs. try and get them out and about for walks in the park swimming etc this way you are spending time together but at the same time they are excerising.
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A
female
reader, love-him +, writes (6 July 2007):
 Well first off.. the person may think that u dont love them anymore as you are bothered by their weight.. explain to them.. you are caring for them.. you care for their health.. and dont at all threaten ur relationship on them. hope i helped..
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