A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i have known this guy my whole life. i moved away when i was 6 but i go back to where we grew up every year. about 4 years ago, we reconnected as adults when i was in town. there was something romantic between us instantly. over the years, we have had our time together but it's mainly been limited to the time we're at home together. he told me last year that if i wanted him, he was mine. i was in a relationship at the time and so that ended there even though i was at a point in which i wanted to try. this year was unusual because now he is engaged and we spent extra time together. i found myself falling for him harder than the times before (and yes i am aware it was probably due to the sense of urgency). he made it clear to me that he still had feelings for me (i.e. holding my hand, kissing me, the things he said) and on top of it all, he would tell me how he regretted proposing in the first place and told me about all of his other doubts about his upcoming nuptuals. i told him that i was the wrong person to give me opinion.since we parted ways, i spent a lot of time, taking steps back from how i feel to give him my opinion. so i told him that i knew he was making a big mistake and that knew it and that i knew he knew it.i haven't heard from him since and i don't know what to do about any of it. oh and im supposed to go to the wedding. do i check on him? do i tell him how i feel (even though if he backs out, i don't want him to do it for me, i want him to do it because he knows it's not right)? do i go to the wedding? where do i go from here?? help!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2009): i cant give my any advice on that question particulary cause iam on the same problem. i am also in love with my engaged friend and he will actually get married next month .he invited me to the wedding which i wont be able to attend . we couldnt be 2gether cause i was in a relationship with his best friend but he broke up with at the time his friend found that gurl who he got engaged wiz.so no way i would tell him about my feelins cause if it is meant 2 be we will get together who knows , so i think u must leave it to fate
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2009): WOW! I think you should check on him. I know that I would if I was in your situation. I have only been in one relationship my whole life. It is truly a gift from heaven. . . I am 20 and my boyfriend is 27. We are both virgins. We hope to get married next year. We have been in our relationship for quite a few years now. We haven't even kissed yet--I know that seems unbelievable but it is true. I know that if he had gone away and then when he came back I was getting ready to sign up to spend the rest of my life someone else, I would be praying that he would check on me especially if I was unhappy and I had voiced it to him. Your friend needs to figure out where his heart is and make the decision that he knows he won't regret later. I would hate to know that he married whoever he is engaged to right now and then not be happy and have to break up a family which causes more heartache in this world when it could have all been avoided in the first place. Try to quiet yourself inside and listen to your heart. Listen for the voice of our Father in heaven. He will speak to you if you are really wanting to hear His voice. It is highly possible that your friend feels trapped right now and has more questions than he knows what to do with. Sometimes my boyfriend just needs me to listen to him while he talks about how he feels so he can process his thoughts better and vise versa.I hope this helps you. . . I will be praying for you and your friend.May God pour out His blessings upon you.Cassandra
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