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I'm gay, I've fallen for my best friend...

Tagged as: Friends, Gay relationships, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (6 July 2008) 6 Answers - (Newest, 1 August 2008)
A age 30-35, * writes:

hi well im using my twin sisters account here.

basically i am gay and iv fallen for ona of my best friends. im 16 years old and in year 9. im not out of the closet yet but i think i want to come out soon as i find it too hard to keep it a secret.

basically theres this guy at school who is BI. hes very popular so he always has a girl on his arm but once when we were staying at a friends house he told me that he thought he was gay. it turns out that hes BI but because of his status he decided to stay in the closet. he doesnt know that im gay but i really really want to tell him because im in love with him and i think he has feelings for me too. he always smiles at me and touches me and once before swimmming he 'accidentally' walked in on me getting changed - when he walked in i was totally naked and im afraid i was in a comprimising position (i.e. i was jerking off). he just smiled and stayed there whilst i cleaned up and then he told me not to be embarased as every guy does it. i was really relieved but ever since then i cant get the look on his face when he saw what i was doing. he seemed fixated on my cock and couldnt seem to take his eyes off it.

as far as i know he doesnt have any experience with guys (i dont either) and i really just want to be his boyfriend and be with him forever.

sorry that this is so long but its all neccessary.

i just want to know how i can talk to him about how i feel about him and maybe propostion him to be my boyfriend.

thank you in advance

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2008):

Guess what?!

I told him...Well actually I got halfway through telling him before he kissed me! Now we're together (two week anniversary today) and I'm just sooooooo happy. I love him so so so so so so so so (well you get the picture) much.

We also came out to everybody (I guess we gave each other confidence). My mum was fine with it but my dad struggled a bit...but we're ok now. His parents were fine about it too. We also had some trouble at school but that was resolved very quickly -by the way I'm actually in year 11...I don't know why I wrote year nine - I must have been thinking of something else when I was typing.

Also, about that experience...he hadn't had any either. I know we havn't been together for long but it felt so right so we got that experience together. I suppose it was just so much more special because we were each other's firsts...don't worry we used protection just in case (even though we dont need it).

thank you all so much for your advice...it all really helped.

lots of love Luke (and Kyle)

xxxxx

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2008):

It sounds to me like he probably likes you too but because he doesn't know that your gay, he's not saying anything because he's scared bout how you'll react if you weren't.

Look, if you really love him, don't screw around. Tell Him. Will it be scary? Yes. Will it be ackward? Probably. But you should do it. If you don't want to tell him stright out, then maybe drop some hints. Trust me there's nothing worse than always woundering what could've happened. I once read a quote that said, "don't give up on someone you can't go a day without thinking about"

Good Luck! I hope it works out!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2008):

Right.

If your 16 your not in year 9.

Your either in Year 11 or 12!

Unless you got held back a few years!

With your problem,

why not invite him for a sleep over or something

and then tell him.

See how he reacts and if he mentions he is confused

suggest exploring with each other.

If he likes it. wait a few weeks to make sure hes not going to turn around and forget about you.

Then maybe mention going out?

Hope this helps

x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2008):

I agree with Chiraven and plus if he is as good of a friend as you say then he will still be your friend no matter what your prefrences are.

best of luck,

Bee

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A male reader, ChiRaven United States +, writes (6 July 2008):

ChiRaven agony auntFirst, why not get your own account? It's really painless and this might not be the last time you need some advice.

This is not an easy situation to handle, but I'll tell you how I saw it done well. My best friend in high school discovered he was gay while in college. One evening while the two of us were out bar-hopping, he brought the subject up while we were driving from one bar to the next. He just said that he had discovered that he was gay. Just like that. And he let me know that he was interested, if I was. I told him that my tastes didn't run that way, but thanks for telling me, and we went right on being friends and right on with our evening.

What I'm saying is, I think that honesty is probably the best way. Find a situation where the two of you can be somewhere together as friends, and just tell this guy about your orientation and about your interest. Don't try to profess great love for him or anything, just let him know you're interested, and leave it up to him. If he responds, the two of you can take it from there. If he's not interested, at least you've given it a good shot.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

o just in case you hadnt guessed im a guy

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