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anonymous
writes: Well, me and my girlfriend have been going out for 8 months. She has a history of lying sometimes, and its hard to trust here. Well anyways her and one of her friends are going on a cruise together. Well i'm concerned about her cheating on me on the cruise. She says she won't but how can I be sure that she doesn't? Or should I even be concerned about it? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, advisorX  +, writes (3 December 2010):
 your girlfriend had a history of lying from you, i dont have any idea how big her lying to you was, but still you have forgiven and accepted her. If she will be doing it again to you,You have all the reason of leaving her and you've got nothing to lose. She has to be more aware that if you will be gone because of her lies, she would rally feel sorry of losing you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2007): to me you said it all in your question...you say she has a history of lies and you find her hard to trust..without trust theres no love and theres no relationship.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your help..you made me realize that i should give her a chance. I really love her, i just think about what might happen and not enjoying what does..thanks I realize that I'm stressing out too much about it. I have no reason really not to believe her. I guess if she tells me she won't i should believe her. I will try to relax...if you have anymore to add please do i really appreciate your help. Thanks again
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female
reader, Lemonpixie  +, writes (26 October 2006):
 Ask yourself this... if she can't go on vacation without freaking you out are you really happy? It's not your fault shes not trustworthy... but freaking out when she is out of yoursite makes for a bad relationship. If its 8 mos. down the line and these issues are coming up what's it going to be in another 8 mos. You may want to consider finding someone more trustworthy in general... I have no idea what she lies about if its major things then there is problems there already. Don't fret because well what can you do right? I've been in this situation... I ended up leaving the guy because everytime he went out I could not help but picture him with other people. Naturally im not jealous but with due reason it's impossible not to be. So weigh out the situation... Has she lied about major things? Like cheating? How did you find out? Was she honest with you in the end or did it arise by some other means? Are you the jealous type? Consider all these and see if the relationship itself is worth it. It will save you lots of time worrying.
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reader, jack23 +, writes (26 October 2006):
 Trust is what makes a good relationship, if dont have this then it is likely that you will have reoccuring problems like this.At the end of the day if she is going to cheat on you it does matter if it happens a month into the relationship or 3 years into it (of course the longer term will be harder to handle) the fact is it will happen. If she does then its worth it happening now to get it over and out of the way so you can make an educated decission about what you want to do regarding your relationship.Stop and think about it tho, why are you so worried?? Has she implied that she is going to cheat, cheated on you already or have you cheated on her? I would assume that none of these has happened it just comes down to the issue of trust, which you probibly have from past relationships. Remember she is not one of your exs, so you should give her a chance.If you have problems trusting her, does she trust you? She could be away at the moment thinking the exact same thing about you, which I would assume she trusts you and so isnt having this problem.It is my assumption that you want this relationship to work, and it is unlikely to if you dont trust her. There is an increasing possibility that this issue could lead to the end of the relationship if you dont tackle it now. Rather than worrying about the possibilitys of what could happen, thus stressing yourself out, think about what is happening. Do you love her? do you want to be with her? if so then you should make the most of the time you have with her and show her that shes appriciated, enjoy yourself rather than looking back and wishing you had done things differently.These no point in stressing about something that may never happen, this will just cause additional problems. Before you think she is cheating wait until of have good reason to, not just because you over thinking about possibilities and working yourself into a hole.Sorry for the lecture, but hope this advice helps.P.s. My girlfriend is currently away with friends, so I know how it feels for your mind to take over in this respect. But when you really think about it you will realise stressing just isnt worth it.Good luck :)
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reader, hot85 +, writes (26 October 2006):
I guess you can't be 100% sure that she won't do it again especially if she has a history of it. If i were you, if your gf hasn't already left for the cruise, and your that concerned about it, id talk to her before she goes, and or tell that you can't keep going on like this knowing that she may do it again. Hope that helps
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