A
female
age
22-25,
*ranny1297
writes:So am I a snitch? I've now got the reputation of a snitch and people say I acted like a "white girl".This was a break and we were in the classroom, with no teacher.My friend and this girl were having a verbal fight about throwing paper at each other and I said that they should just stop because it's just paper. The girl fighting with my friend does not know how to control her anger and she is always rude to everyone. I didn't want to get involved.Afterwards we forgot about everything and me and my friend started talking about something completely unrelated to what had just happened. Then the rude girl comes into the conversation asking rudely, "what are you talking about, what did you say??" she repeatedly kept asking that, thinking we were talking about her, and I said, "Your not the highlight of everyone's life", in a jokey way . That was a big mistake. She got so angry and said that she was going to beat me up. She was screaming a swearing (this girl is bigger than me)knocking over chairs to get to me - it was really scary, everyone was to scared to do anything, no one had ever seen this girl so angry, and crying with anger. She was coming to beat me up. Everyone was scared for me and that it was going to be bad.Then 4 of her friends tried to hold her back from me (if it wasn't for them I would've been dead by now) and they told me to run. I ran for my life out of the classroom and didn't look back. I turned into the first room there was and there were teachers there. I hid behind one of the filing cabinets because I was shit scared. I stared shivering and I began to cry (I'm a sensitive person). It felt like she was going to come after me, that's why I told the teacher that asked me what was wrong about what had happened.My friend took my bag to the next lesson and I went to the head of year crying out of fear and what had been one of the most scariest moments in my life - in a matter of minutes. I wrote a statement there of what happened. I was so scared.In half an hour everyone in the year knew what had happened, it spread so quickly. The rude girl was calm again at the end of the day. But everyone knew I told the teachers. Today I come into school and I'm now known as a snitch. I don't snitch if it's none of my business, if I wasn't involved or get someone else in trouble, but seriously I was about to get beaten up. People are calling me a cry baby, snitch, woos and so on. My friends are all at me asking why I snitched, everyone is asking why I snitched because the girl is always in trouble and now I got her into "more trouble".I don't think I snitched did I, I only snitched because she was coming after me. If it was someone else I won't have told anyone because I wasn't involved. No one will trust me now - I am now known as a snitch. What do I do, did I do the right thing?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2014): No, it's not snitching because you were in enough danger that her FRIENDS had to hold her back. But you WERE very rude to her when you told her she wasn't the highlight of your life and you pissed her off. You're right, that WAS a big mistake and you own an apology. You had no right to do that. Yes, she went overboard, but you DID act disrespectful toward her. Next time someone asks what you're talking about, include them in the conversation! IF it's that private, don't talk about it around people. Of course she thought you were talking about her! Sounds like your school is pretty ghetto and telling you you act like a white girl means you're not street enough for them. "real" rules don't work on the streets and you should know that by now. What I'd like to know is why there was no teacher and no one came when there was a verbal altercation. Sounds to me like the girl needs expelled (PERMANANTLY) and the school needs sued. The teacher who left the room should be fired and shouldn't be allowed to work in a school again. The employees at the school certainly weren't doing their jobs. But next time, don't insult people who you know have anger issues and don't snitch people out for things when you can solve the problem on your own or just let it die down.
A
female
reader, cmarieky  +, writes (10 July 2014):
You did the most right thing to do. And on something like this that you know you're right don't doubt yourself. And don't give in to negative peer pressure. It may be cool or popular to hold out on information but what if the situation escalated and something serious happen. Always do the right thing even when u are the only one doing the right thing. I respect you kid. You are not a coward. More adults should do what u did. If people switched more burglaries would be too afraid of who may see n tell. Honestly all crimes would decrease if more people would snitch. The code of silence allows all negativity to continue. At the end of the day u may just have to have no friends better than having those who follow n persuade others to follow. Good luck. U seem wise though.
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A
female
reader, Euphoric29  +, writes (10 July 2014):
Dear OP,
So, if this was "snitching"... What would have been the "honorable" solution here? To get beaten up so bad you end up at the hospital? Or to hit that other girl until she learned to "respect" you? Or to go after her with your friends, when she's on her way back from school, to teach her a lesson? To take a knife to class next time, to protect yourself?
This whole thing about "not snitching" creates a law system of its own, with a lot of violence. It will benefit bullies like that girl. Violent and crazy people. But not peaceful people who just want to be left alone.
Yeah, so now the girl's in trouble. Big deal. She is always in trouble anyways, and if they had found you in a puddle of your own blood, she would have been in trouble, too.
Maybe someone should tell your friends that what they call "snitching" can actually a way to keep those safe who aren't crazy and angry and violent. I don't see why one should protect troublemakers at all costs. In many societies, there are a lot of unreported crimes, because no one wants to be a snitch. It sounds like it keeps a community together and protects them from the outside enemy, like the police. But actually, I think sometimes the enemy is inside. It's the bullies who have completely taken over. Each time someone is NOT a snitch, this means there is a victim left alone, without a voice, without any other option than either to suffer or become violent and vengeful.
Bottom line, you absolutely did the right thing. And your answer made me a little philosophical :).
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2014): It's a good thing you told. You did the right thing even if it wasn't you who she was going after you should tell someone it's not snitching it's doing the right thing and if it were to happen to someone else i'm sure they would really appreciate you for helping them. It makes you a good person try not to care what others think when your doing whats right.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2014): I didn't tell anyone when this (similar, but with knives) happened to me and I was scared for a LONG time. Now that you've told, IF anything happens (steer clear of her and her "friends"), teachers will know where to start because you reported it. It's better to report it than not to, trust me. Ignore anyone who calls you a snitch and tell your friends "well, if you were ever in danger, I hope you'd appreciate me supporting you" and walk off.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (10 July 2014):
 Franny I am very proud of you for telling! That's a scary thing to do and I would have told too even as an adult.. someone who needs 4 people to hold her back has anger issues and control issues.
You were not feeling safe and you told an adult and that was the right thing to do.
this was directly affecting you and it was not snitching.
She's a bully and bullies rely on fear. Do not be afraid. Her friends are all calling you snitch because they are just as afraid of her as you are but they hide it by being friends with her.
and I agree that if someone (anyone) is in danger then telling an adult is NOT snitching.. it's a safety issue.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (10 July 2014):
 Nope, you are not a snitch.
Don't buy into whatever crap this bully wants to FEED you. Just STOP talking to her or about her.
If she was trying to beat someone up, even if it's not you - I don't consider it snitching. Bullies like her needs to understand that she has no power OTHER than what YOU (and the other students) GIVE her. So GIVE her no power by "silently" agree/disagree with her.
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