A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:ok, so there's this guy i have a crush on, he's a sophomore i'm a freshmen, we have like 10-15ish mutual friends (real life not facebook), but we've never like really talked or been introduced or anything. he may or may not know who i am, i dont really know. I want to talk to him, just to test the waters, see if this could happen. he is gay, like completely, but im not. how do i approach him? ask someone else to introduce us? get over nerves? what do i talk about/say?I know that gay teens are warned not to get to attached to people who are JUST crushes, and i agree, i would just like to talk, either see if he would even go for me, or end up with a friend i could relate to, because I have no (out) gay friends that i know of anywayso, sorry for the long question, I'd just like some advice, please dont judge, just would like to meet, talk, socialize, etc. thanks for your help
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male
reader, AvgGuy1 +, writes (17 March 2011):
 The way you get to the point of being able to 'test the waters' so to speak is get to know the person (fairly intimately). To do so you first have to get introduced or talk to him during some common activity. You have to find out what you two have in common though... and that's always the hard part. Additionally, find out what he's into (extra-curricular activities; e.g. sports, music, art, movies, video games, etc). Once you know things he likes it's not hard to figure out what's common between you two. You can then approach him and ask if he wants to do something together.
Get one of your mutual friends to introduce you (best to do so at parties or something similar).
'Accidentally' run into him on multiple occasions... and then point that out. Say something like 'We gotta stop meeting like this' ... and then smile or wink or something.
If you, yourself, think you are having feelings for him, and that you might be bi/gay, and you really need someone to talk to... you can always go up to him and say... 'Hey... can I talk to you sometime... I think you might be able to help me with something that you are uniquely qualified help me with'. If he asks what? and there are not a bunch of people you can tell him you've been having feelings for another guy and you think you might be gay. If there are a bunch of people around tell him you'd rather talk about it in private.
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