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I want to fix things after I freaked him out!

Tagged as: Crushes, Friends, Health<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (1 October 2018) 1 Answers - (Newest, 2 October 2018)
A female United Kingdom age 22-25, anonymous writes:

There's a person I still have feelings for who I used to talk to, but not anymore due to some of the things I did in which I was sorry for and apologised lots of times . I hate the fact I still like him as it makes me feel so upset and worthless , he has had a few girl friends since I met him and the fact he has had girlfriends doesn't bother me so much and that he is in a relationship currently also doesn't make me feel sad as I have got better at accepting that I do still like him and that's not necessarily a bad thing and ive just learnt to deal with the fact I will probably still have feelings for him up until I meet someone else but I haven't yet since meeting him.

Every time he sees me now he always has the same facial expression on his face and looks really freaked out by me and looks as though he has seen a ghost in which at times I can understand why he reacts like this when he sees me. At times I can see the funny side of this as he just looks funny but sometimes his reactions just makes me want to cry and I don't know how to deal with it because I think am I really that bad to the point you have to react like that , when we spoke I just did some creepy things and started to like and did not know how to express my fondness for him and tell him I wanted to be his girlfriend so I rang up a lot and send a lot of texts . I did not intentionally mean to push him away or freak him out it was just because it was the first time I had met someone who I really liked .This is why he really doesn't like me and is freaked out by me amongst other reasons in which I said I apologised for and he has also just been as equally childish as me . I have seen him a few times when ive been out and the way he looks at me just saddens me and I'm wondering what I can do when he looks at me like this so I don't feel as sad ? there has been times when I just want to go up to him and say I don't want any issues between us anymore and don't want to be hurtful to one and other or be childish anymore and that im sorry as the situation is making me feel sad and has gone on to long and we should agree to be mature and just apologise . I don't know how to go about doing this because I don't think he would give me the chance as he just always looks freaked out . Any advice please ?

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (2 October 2018):

Honeypie agony auntHe has a GF, so maybe it's time you accept that you had a crush that was off in the timing, and perhaps maturity level.

I think you were simply too "intense" for him.

If you later on find yourself liking a guy, HOLD your horse, don't call and text like you are possessed.Temper you desire to talk to the guy to a level that is bot excessive or more than HE is calling/texting you.

Don't be a text-pest. People actually have lives outside of their phones, I think you know that. And getting to KNOW someone is MUCH better done in person.

STOP beating yourself up for having being a tad overzealous with this guy. He obviously found it too much and now he is no longer interested. So ACCEPT that HE moved on to another girl.

If you do see him out and about just send a brief smile but don't feel you NEED to explain or apologize or even TALK to him.

Just learn from that experience for the future.

You are both young and will make plenty more mistakes along the way. It's OK.

As for you interpreting the way he looks at you... STOP. You don't know what goes on in his noggin, OK?

Chin up and LET it go.

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