A
female
age
41-50,
*lowergirl888
writes:My boyfriend dumped me last night and it was only the day before he was lookin at houses with me and saying he thought we were heading for a full relationship . A little bit of history behind us is that we met last year and I was ready with my ex of 10 years who I was unhappy with . I left my ex for him and after 8 months i ended it with my new lover as I went back to my ex this was through pure being scared of starting a new relationship and going back to a comfort zone. Anyway I quickly realised I had made a mistake and me and my new lover ( ex) had stayed in touch . We started seein each other again and it was strained abit cos of the situation but it's only been 2 weeks and he has ended it . I did some silly things because my ex was stil holding back on giving me love and I started moving rest of mt stuff out his flat purely to get a reaction which has back fired I also told him that he just wants me for sex even though it's not the case. Then he has suddenly ended it . I'm very upset and I wanted us to make it work , he says he wants us to be friends and is happy if I want to chill out at his place cpl nights a week but says the relationship is over. I wanted us to work out so much and now I don't know what to do as I love him very much
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (26 January 2013):
 You left one guy for him, then you went back to the old guy.
now you want him back... and he doesn't want to be your toy.
understandable.
I think that you won't like this advice:
you need to let Both the old ex and the new ex go.
you need to find a good counselor that can help you work on yourself and find peace and happiness within yourself.
Once you are happy with yourself alone, then you can add a new partner to the mix.
your history with the ex is tainted by your back and forth with the first ex and I doubt you can repair the relationship enough to make it healthy and workable.
A
female
reader, R1 +, writes (26 January 2013):
 Sounds like you've messed this guy about a bit and he is trying to do what he feels is best for himself and get out. Maybe you can win him back, it does happen... But if not its a lesson learnt and you will need to move on, spend some time alone and work out what you really want. He isn't the only man out there who will make you happy.
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