A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i have fallen in love with my wife's sister. i think she feels the same way for me. should i tell her how i feel about her or just keep this to myself? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2007): Oh! A case & a question same as mine. I am 40 married since 12 years with three kids. I loved my wife(34)and I still take great care for her but love has somewhat diverted towards her sister who is 22 unmarried. Miss 22 knows from my gestures that I love her a lot, wants to have sex with her and so on....She has even discussed this issue with my wife too. My wife explained her that it must be her misunderstanding. Beleive me I want to confess to miss 22 that it is true. But I am worried about my married life after this. So till this time I am keeping it to myself, but it really hurts me. Miss 22 likes me for many reasons, like I am educated, hardworking, caring but I doubt she may like to listen that I have feelings for her. She may get upset and stop visiting us after that. So if you REALLY love her, just keep on loving her. Dont ask love in reyurn. It has even better taste. Dont spoil your married life. Your wife needs you and perhaps loves you too. Find charms in your own wife and try to ignite fire between you two. AND if you want to be in peace and do a lil justice to yourself, avoid looking at your sister in law - until the time she is married or walk away smoothly.
You will see you will have lesser problems in life. Now I have stopped sending her love signals myself. You also take a U turn. Please.
A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (20 September 2007):
 You think you've fallen for your wifes sister???? You haven't experienced falling for anything yet. Wait until she cracks you over the head with a frying pan, then you'll fall...Don't do it.
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A
male
reader, Zim  +, writes (20 September 2007):
 I think you should do your utmost to forget your feelings about your wife's sister. You married your wife for a reason, you said the vows and you love her. Would you appreciate it if she had feelings for your brother/friend and then had an affair? I didn't think so.
We all have instances when we become infatuated with someone. However, these feelings disappear after a while as long as you work at them. Do not mention your feelings to your wife's sister. At the moment, if she does like you, she only has an inkling that you might like her. If she knows that you like her then she might start causing untold trouble. For instance, flirting with you whilst your wife is in the room or indeed not present. This will make it more difficult for you to have control.
So in summary, my advice is don't tell your wife's sister your feelings but don't bottle them up either. Try to reduce them instead. Think of your wife and why you love her. What things does she do and has done in the past to make you smile? I'm sure their are a number of things that you love about her. You have a good thing, don't ruin it by giving into a possible fantasy.
I hope this helps.
ZIM
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A
female
reader, On Cloud9 +, writes (20 September 2007):
 I recommend you keep it to yourself. This is not something that will do you, your wife or her sister any good.
Her sister is likely just being nice to you because she trusts you and probably cannot imagine that you feel this way.
Over and above everything it will destroy their relationship if anything ever happened and cause major riffs in their family and it is likely to be what you cant have you want scenario. I strongely suggest you concentrate more on your wife and forget about starting anything with her sister.
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