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I spy on my next door neighbour and want to watch her have sex with her boyfriend, is this ok?

Tagged as: Friends, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (19 December 2007) 8 Answers - (Newest, 29 May 2008)
A male Belgium age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Living next door is a beautiful girl my age. We are both 18. We have been friends and have flirted and done other fun things. My bedroom looks over at hers. I have sometimes seen her undressing and doing other sexy things. The other night I saw another guy in her room. They were making out. The shades were left open. I think they might sometime soon have sex. To be honest I would like to see her doing it. I would like to watch them have sex. What suggestions would you give for me watching them without being caught? Could she want me to see her having sex?

I want to do it with her. If I see them doing it. Should I tell her? What would I say? How can I say that I would like to be with her?

View related questions: flirt, neighbour

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2008):

why would u want to have sex with her?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2007):

Find a time when you can see that she's in her room alone (and she's not doing anything sexual/undressing at the time), and get her attention from your window. Wave at her, throw a rock at the window, etc.

It doesn't matter what you say after that but keep it innocent and don't let her know you've already been spying on her that way. Act like you just noticed that you can see her through there recently.

This way, the shoe is on her foot.

If she doesn't want to be seen then she'll pull the shades. (If she forgets and then later catches you watching her, well hey, you warned her ahead of time, right? It's not good but it's better than getting caught without even warning her at all.)

If she actually does get off on the idea of you watching her undress (or have sex), then believe me, SHE will make sure the window shades are open just right for you to see.

And if she does want you to see then she probably wouldn't mind you making a move. That, or else she totally doesn't even give you a serious shot and she just gets off on the attention of torturing you with the view.

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A female reader, nikkij United Kingdom +, writes (21 December 2007):

nikkij agony auntYeh I seriously don't care what you do, but don't tell her after that you watched...even if she did want you to you really see that conversation going well?

You said y'all are friends and flirt...just keep doing that and maybe you'll get lucky...

As for spying on comment.

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A male reader, jm81690 Canada +, writes (20 December 2007):

jm81690 agony auntYou sound like a pervert, but in the given situation, I can't deny I might act the same way, as would just about any guy.

To answer your questions, if you don't want to get caught, don't look at her, and if you do watch her having sex with her boyfriend, it is most definatley not going to go well if you tell her that. Every girl she knows will know you're a pervert, and that'd blow your chances of getting sex, ever.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2007):

U Can Do That but it's so rude, it's okey to want to have sex whith her but dont watch them do it ,tell her u love her mabe write her a poem but stop spying on her!!!!!

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A male reader, SamuraiRick United States +, writes (20 December 2007):

SamuraiRick agony auntDo you realize how many guys are out here drooling at your situation, wishing they were in your shoes?

There is an issue of privacy here to consider, but when she blatantly has her shades open while she undresses, and makes out with this guy, there could also very well be a little exhibitionism going on here too. She might very well know that you are looking in on her. If that’s true, there could be something there, but lets put that aside.

Yes it’s an invasion of privacy, but on the other hand all you are doing is using your eyes. If she were my daughter I’d kick your ass! If you were my bud, I’d ask if I can watch too.

You’ve already been spying on her; I don’t think that’s going to change. But be advised, if you see her actually having sex with this guy, it might damage the way you can relate to her, and it seems you want to take her boyfriend’s place.

That being the case, be very, very careful here. Never tell her you are spying on her: that could do some irreversible damage. If you ever want a future relationship with her, be nice and greet her every chance you get, do neighborly things, make her notice you. It wouldn’t hurt to ask her out, even if she is seeing this guy. You don’t know how serious this is, and I find that in half the girls I have dated in my lifetime they were already dating other guys at the time too. Sometimes you can be in a relationship just to be in it until a better one comes along...then you jump ship! That’s the way of the world.

Remember that old rap song where this guy asks a girl out, and she she says “I got a man” and he says back “what’s he got to do with it” A dumb song but it has a lot of truth in it. I’m not saying go out and chase all girls who seem to be taken. But just because they are taken, doesn’t mean they can’t be taken from what they are taken with…something like that!

But just play it cool, see where things stand with her and this guy. Try to stay out of trouble with the peeping….that’s what the internet is for. Make a move and just ask her out. You never know.

Peace Out!

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A male reader, Richard_EMids United Kingdom +, writes (20 December 2007):

Richard_EMids agony auntYou can watch her deliberately and she can 'perform' deliberately, but if the cops call round YOU will be the one on a sex charge. Unfair but true.

Suddenly the world will be very different. You will lose friends. People will know you as a pervert. They will fetch their children in when you're around. Your life prospects will change.

Better to look at some porn instead.


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A female reader, hugs2muchgal United States +, writes (20 December 2007):

hugs2muchgal agony auntYou need some help. Or access to a porn site. Now.

Stop staring at her, don't watch her have sex, she does not want someone seeing her do that!

If you want to be with her for real, tell her you are attracted to her for her personality, looks, etc, but leave out the stalker like behavior of watching her. That'll creep her out and you'll have a restraining order.

Seriously, as a teen girl, if I knew any guy was doing what you were doing, I'd tell my parents immediately and have you reported so stop.


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