A
female
age
13-15,
Angel24925
writes:Im 13 and about to be 14 in a few weeks. I have had thoughts about sex and just really started talking to my mother about it. She thinks that because I'm 13 i shouldn't be thinking about sex. Also i am bisexual and my mother is homophobic and always says ewww or something of that sort when she sees a homosexual and my grandmother is not as bad but is the same way and it hurts. Today i told my grandmother i was bisexual and she hit me and pushed me down and told me that I'm 13 and I don't know what i am. What should i do? they are thinking about putting me out the house and into the detention home because they feel they don't know me anymore.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2008): Dear, I am considerabley older than you and I don't even tell my mother that much about my sex life. Let alone my GRANDMOTHER.
Especially when you're 13.
Sexual thoughts or fantasies should be kept personal (in your head and bed), and shared only with someone once you're in a secure, long relationship with them. I highly recommend waiting a few years to REALLY decide if you're bisexual (make sure your feelings are real before acting on them), and wait several years to begin sexual activity with anyone but yourself. Having sex young and not properly educated can lead to emotional issues, as well as the higher risk of STIs/STDs.
Hope this helps!
A
female
reader, diva girl +, writes (21 May 2008):
you can't help what your preferences are! but they shouldn't have theright to tell you who to date or what gender to like!! good luck girl! best wishes!! xoxoxoxoxoxoxox
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A
male
reader, WizardOfWaz  + ♥, writes (20 May 2008):
 Maybe your folks have a point that you're at a developing stage and its a bit early to start labeling yourself with one thing or another in sexual terms. And its definately not a good idea to confront your people about their homophobia this will just anger them. If they were racist and you brought a black boy home do you seriously think they would say "Oh you have a black boy, how nice, we are not racists now."?
Cutting through peoples prejudices takes time, experience and patience. It is really not a gig you should be bothering yourself about at all. If you fancy girls as well as boys, fair enough, but try and keep the part that is offensive to your family to yourself for the time being.
Yes, they may be in the wrong, but if all you're going to get for being "right" is a slap and threats of being locked up, why bother telling them? Many parents are grossed out at the fact that their kids have any sexual feeling at all, just like you feel a bit yukky thinking about your parents having a sex life.
So let this one pass. You kicked up a storm but hopefully once things have cooled off you will have learned a lesson in discretion being the far wiser part of valour.
It's ok to be in the right, but it is even better to be wise enough to keep it to yourself rather than try to be brave beyond what you can actually handle.
Good luck lass.
Waz
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