A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi there, I'm in my late twenties and I value my lifestyle possibly too much.I live in a small city that, to me, has everything. We're five minutes away from several beaches, forrests, tramping and hiking spots and one of the most beautiful native parks in the world etc. I consider that I live in one of the most beautiful places on earth. Trouble is, I'm afraid I'm TOO in love with my hometown and it's going to damage me careerwise.I have no kids, no mortage, no ties. I've been with my boyfriend for many years and the both of us are highly qualified and searching for work here, but currently, there's nothing in our fields. We haven't been lucky enough to make many friends and don't have much family. We are in the prime time of our lives to just pick up and go wherever the good work is! Yet the last thing we want to do is leave our beloved hometown.We literally tear up thinking about all our favourite places we go on the weekend together i.e. swimming, our bikes along the beachfront, our long drives along the countryside, tramping through the caves here etc. We both know that we can earn much more money in the bigger cities and have many more career opportunities, but we're both so sentimental.. we just want to stay where we are, where we're happy.When we think of the big city, we think of traffic jams, pollution, waiting in lines, freeways, hourlong drives to get to the nearest beach etc. A living nightmare for us, as we're so used to just jumping in the car and heading out on a five minute drive to the seafront. Does this sound rediculous? Young people are supposed to just pack up and go wherever the opportunities are. I don't know of anyone else like us. I'm wondering how many of you out there value lifestyle over career.. and if you've been faced with a similar decision, what did you decide and did you feel it was the right choice?Despite being newly qualified and having been offered jobs in other centres, all I'd really love to do is take anything I can get HERE and just continue to treasure the lifestyle we have. I can thank my boyfriend for the way I am. He made me realise how beautiful our city is and how to treasure the simple things in the environment etc. Now I feel heartbroken at the thought of leaving :(I'm too embarrassed to tell ANYONE in my life about this, as I think it's abnormal. I don't know anyone that would relate to how I feel.Your thoughts are appreciated.Thanks
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male
reader, Jonnyt  +, writes (2 May 2011):
Hi. I keep thinking of exactly the same issue. I have achieved a resonable amount and have undertaken a new course but I fear that it will only offer opportunities too far away. I love my city and only realised recently how much and now am in a dilemma. I have friends earning much more than me in London and Dublin and this makes me feel bad even though I am happy for them. Though extra earnings may be lost to higher housing costs and tax. You can't put a price on happiness. You are so lucky to have a town you love. Many people on massive salaries hate where they live or don't have the time to enjoy their environment. So I am going to content myself to more free time with friends and family and enjoy my beautiful city rather than keeping working to achieve more careerwise and put myself in an early grave. Happy to discuss with you. Hope this helps.
A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (30 January 2011):
 I left my hometown to go off to college and have regretted it ever since. No job oportunities there either, just a laid back beauty unparalled anywhere on the planet. Kailua, Oahu, Hawaii. It's too expensive now to ever dream of living there. Don't feel bad about loving an environment. Yeah, it's different, but hey you'll NEVER regret staying, only leaving.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (30 January 2011):
 I use to say this: you either choose the work and move to where the work is, or you choose the location and take the work you can find and create there. Great if you can have both the dream job and the dream location, but it all comes down to what will make you happier. No one can tell you it's wrong, and it's not at all unusual for people to want to stay in their hometown. Especially not if they are proud of where they come from. By staying you maintain your hometown and make sure it stays up and alive, and doesn't get deserted or lack people with skills. Many who get educated leave their cities and towns, or even countries, to find better work. That effectively robs their hometowns and countries of talent and skilled people, making it poor in that sense.
Just because there's no work opportunity in your field right now doesn't mean there wont be in the future. You could do other work in the meantime, or build something for yourself within what you have studied, or take some work elsewhere for a few years just to get some experience and then go back home.
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A
female
reader, GG96  +, writes (30 January 2011):
Thats not abnormal at all. Well, you have to ask yourself "what is right for me?" Is it better to get work and then have a better chance at a career? Or is it better for you to stay in the tiny city you've grown to love so much? What I'd do is search really hard for work all around the small city, if successful, stay, if unsuccessful, make a pros and cons list about moving to a big city. If the pros outwiegh the cons, move to the city and vice versa. OR move to the suburbs and commute into a city!! It's barely polluted, there's no traffic jams, and alot of them have parks nearby. I live in the suburbs and i never want to leave. Plus you get a house, not an apartment.And if you do end up in the city, don't worry, they aren't that bad.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (30 January 2011):
 It is not abnormal to love something, no matter what it is. People have felt tortured being torn away from something far less, this is your home, of course you would feel sorrow at the thought of leaving it, who wouldn't?
If you are happy now, what is forcing you to leave? If it is about finances, if you are in dire need of a better paying job than you would have to leave but think about it this way, somewhere down the line you can make enough money to start your own business in your hometown so you will not have to leave again. Life in the city is horrible for someone who is not used to it, I live in a large city and even I find it abhorrent at times but then, like you, you begin to appreciate the simple beauties in things and there are indeed simple beauties in every city.
I hope that helps.
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