A
female
age
51-59,
*iddyrat
writes:I am a very shy person and work in a shop. I met this man and we statred talking. Eventually he started comming to visit me before work and we sit and have coffee together. We have a lot of things in common and enjoy each others company. We text each other all day and I receive about 20 text from him daily. He has taken me out once and we had a fun time joking and laughing. I would like our relationship to move on. When he leave to go to work after our coffee I sometimes touch him on the arm when we say goodbye. I think he might be shy too. I don;t know how to tell him I am falling in love with him as I think it will chase him away.Some day I think we are moving a step forward, but then it feels like we have moved back 3 steps. What do I do next? What is the next step for me to make?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Gridrebel  +, writes (15 January 2010):
 Is he married, taken, gay or otherwise unavailable? Instead of being giddy and nonsensible, start asking him questions such as have you ever...? Make the questions direct such as: been married, ever lived with anyone, or word the questions like does/did your girlfriends ever...oh I dunno, taken you on a trip to???? See what I mean? You need to find out more about him. Don't try and force him. There could be a reason he is not more aggresive in becoming closer. If not, some people are slower than others. He may not even feel the need to have a close relationship with you. Does every male/female relationship have to lead somewhere other than friendship?
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (15 January 2010):
He is shy. You don't need to tell him you're falling in love. Just ask him out on another date and tell him you'd really like to get to know him a lot more. He'll understand that, and if he really likes you, will be happy to take it further.
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