A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok...So this is a long dilemma that I have.Right so...I kissed this guy on a night out about 4 months ago. We were friendly, that is that we talked on nights out if we bumped into each other. Anyway that night (that we kissed) we had been flirtin with each other and I think all his mates caught on, but the thing is, is that his mates sorta make fun of him and one of his close friends is good friends with me so eventually after everyone found out we had kissed they began to make fun of me simply because they think the guy i kissed is not attractive in any way.When we kissed, I told everyone afterwards that it was the drink that made me do it and i regretted doing it. But now the problem is is that i think i have developed feelings for him. I have mentioned this to a friend who also knows him but I began to deny it awhile later.The thing is now is that everytime i am out and i see him we wouldn't really talk to each other likebefore, he told me he thought i was hot etc the night we kissed but im not sure if it was the drink talking. now the problem is, is i have feelings for him but we barely ever talk. I never see him out because i don't go out that much so I dont know whether to get over him or risk my friends taking the piss outta me if I say it to them??!HELP!Ps: Sorry for how long and akward that was xx
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHey guys!
Thanks a million for all the advice.
The only problem is that I NEVER See him.
I mean I don't go out as often as I'd like and even at that I'm not 100% sure he'd be out.
The mutual friends we have, well one was supportive when I said it to them, they offered to text him to find out but I chickened out. The thing is is that she is so pretty so it'd stand to her if he let me down because she gets any guys she likes.
I think I'll give it a shot next time I'm out,
Even if I just smile or say hi, I'm sure it'll make me feel much better about my situation.
Thanks again :)
A
female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries  +, writes (23 June 2009):
 hun who cares what your friends say!!
i am sure they would want to see you happy! and it's not all about looks!!
i say talk to him and tell him how you feel! so what your friends take the p*** it's your life and your happiness if you like him then you go for it!!
don't let this get away just because your friends take the mick.
no-one is perfect and i am sure your friends aren't.
if you want to be with im then you be wtih im don't listen to them!!!
hope this helps hun.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2009): I learned a long time ago that you can't worry about what others think. Go for it. I've been in love with this girl since middle school who was made fun of up until high school. I publicly showed it in middle school and I don't regret a moment of it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2009): Well, i completely understand your situation, because I had [actually still have] a very similar situation. We only talk when we go to parties and drink, because I think we are both very shy and know that we like each other, but are too chicken to suck it up and talk to each other when not drunk.
But thats the problem, in your case too, I think. You need to establish a relationship now, even if its just slowly. Like in a group setting, just acknowledging his presence, or laughing directly at one of his jokes, you know?
As for what your friends think, if I could tell you one thing it would be to screw them. Disregard whatever they think. Way too many times have I changed my opinion because of what my friends thought, both consciously and subconsciously. And it isnt worth it, I can assure you. Its you that has feelings for him, not them, and thats the point! If I could give you one piece of advice it would be that: Do what you what, what your intuition tells you.
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A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera  +, writes (23 June 2009):
 If you've found someone for whom you have feelings, and he reciprocates your feelings, then I say go for it. You don't get an oppportunity to be happy in a relationship every day, and when you do, it is much too rare and precious for you to let it pass you by because you're worried about being made fun of. Screw those friends of his.
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A
female
reader, laura585  +, writes (23 June 2009):
Aw I've done something similar before, said I didnt like a guy that I did just because of my friends. Maybe word that you regretted kissing him got back to him and he's bummed out about it? I never did anything about my secret crush altho I wish I would've because he was a really sweet guy. Just dont be ashamed about the fact that you like him! You said that you 2 have a mutual friend, that could be your ticket in right there. Maybe find out where they are going to hang out next time and run into him again. Use it as an opportunity to tell him you like him, or at the least become friends again and flirt and such and just see where that goes. I don't know but it seems worth a shot!
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