A
male
age
36-40,
*ommyG
writes:i have this girl i like living with me sleeping in the same bed as me and acting like my girlfriend yet when i ask for a kiss or anythink that suggest we are going out she says she just wants to be friends. what should i do? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2007): I agree with danielpew that this girl is playing games and with 83 that you should probably invite her to spend her evenings on the couch. But be very nice about it, be very cool!
Say, "Let's keep our friendship, name, that's very important to me. It's valuable to me, but if we keep sleeping in the same bed together, we need to reevaluate our relationship, because I also need a real girlfriend in my life. We are friends, and I want that to continue, but I'm also looking around for something more, okay?"
See what she says then . . . and stay cool!
A
male
reader, chlez83  +, writes (21 December 2007):
She probably wants you two to be friends with benefits but i imagine that may hurt your emotions in the end because you want something more serious.You really haven't specified as to whether the sleeping in the same bed includes sex.I'll assume it does.Tell her to sleep in the couch next time.Since she says you are friends,treat her as a friend.No heavy touch or caressing of bodies and don't spend too much time together.
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A
male
reader, leonard j, Douglas  +, writes (21 December 2007):
Guess, You'er hot to trot and she is not,
And sleeping in the same bed is a bunch of rot.
There seems to be something that you forgot,
She'll have a lot to lose, and you will not.
Have a wonderful Christmas.
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A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit  +, writes (21 December 2007):
 When you say sleep together, you mean without sex?
Sounds like she is using you as her Emotional Cookie Man. She keeps you around for attention and an ego boost, but you do not address her emotional needs that make her feel love and attraction for you.
-Frank B Kermit, author of Everything Out Of Her Mouth Is A Test.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (20 December 2007):
 In my opinion, she is playing games with you. But even if she isn't, that's certainly a situation you can't maintain. Since you're only her friend, act as her friend and don't expect anything else, ever. Don't WANT anything else. Find yourself someone who will share your bed ALSO for sex, and tell the current girl to please sleep in the couch, as you will have some action. Remember, a friend wouldn't stand in your way.
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