A
male
age
30-35,
*azzedUp
writes:Okay, I moved churches a year ago, and day one, I met this girl. First thing I did was ask my older (and wiser) sister who's 32, to find out about her. She's a country girl (we live in Alabama lol, what else do you expect?), and she loves to express it, but she's got enough prep in her as well to be a nice, good girl. Not trashy at all. Well I've spent the last year in and out of relationships, one lasting 5 months and breaking my heart when it ended, but I'm okay now. I'm single, and have recently started spending time with the girl I met a year ago. Her boyfriend is abusive, neglectful, and just damn unappreciative of how special she is, and she realizes it, and plans to break up with him. If you're thinking that I'm trying to get her to leave him for me, you're wrong. She has admitted to liking me since we met (sweet irony), but I immediately told her I had no intentions of breaking up her and her boyfriend. I've continued to tell her she needs to do what makes her happy, but it is beginning to look like she's starting to favor me over him. I feel bad because I feel like I'm taking her from him, because I do want her. And I realize he isn't treating her right, but I still feel kind of bad. She hasn't cheated on him with me. We have just hung out after school and church. That's all. But I've caught her giving me long gazes. Tell me what I should do and if it's wrong for me to be having these conflicting emotions. I'm having a hard time differentiating between what would be the right thing to do. Please help. I do like her but really want what is best. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, urdudekoolin  +, writes (4 February 2010):
Actually from your point of view it seems very positive for your futre. However we analyse all happening as we like. Even its its small positive we take it decisively and if its negative to us we omit those feelings/ issues.I feel you should wait and try to look upon the issues from bird view with out involving your emotions in the happenings.And also let her decide and do about her present relationship. I feel every thing goes well for all. The best may happen....
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2010): Whatever you do, don't do anything unless she's already left this boyfriend of hers. The problem is, that even though she tells you how horribly he treats her, she's still with him! No one's forcing her, it is out of her own desire to be with this boy. I don't think she has any right to go to you and complain about him, it's not any of your concern. Its her problem to deal with, and she's avoiding the confrontation. If she can't make up her mind, then this shows you what type of girl she is. She probably won't leave him unless she has you as a backup guy, which just shows she's afraid to be on her own. Also it shows she's not really that much into you, she just doesn't handle being alone.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (2 February 2010):
Do nothing, and wait for her to leave him. That's the best thing to do. That way you know you're not being played at all.a
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2010): Then just let whatever is going to happen, happen
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