| A
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hi cupids, I was always ashamed of being a virgin and had promised never to tell whoever I lost it to. Everyone thinks am experienced. I lied to my current ex boyfriend about my virginity. I always acted like I was not a virgin and he noticed he couldn't get inside me. I still maintained that I wasn't a virgin and when he asked me, I told him I lost my virginity two years ago and we broke up a few days back due to some issues. He never really seemed to have cared about the break up. I would feel ashamed if he knew I was a virgin that was why I did not tell him. It would break my wall. Should I tell him I lost my virginity to him? I do not think it would change anything tho considering his I do not care attitude. Or maybe I should tell him in the future?
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broke up, lost my virginity, my ex Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anon_e_mouse  +, writes (3 January 2013):
 He's your ex. He doesn't need to know. He's not in your life anymore. Just move on.
A
male
reader, JustHelpinAgain  +, writes (3 January 2013):
Dont tell him. If he is an ex then he will go off and brag about it and that will be much worse. Most of all stop feeling insecure about being a normal person. Just make extra sure you can trust your next boyfriend so you can talk openly, you will feel much more relaxed.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (3 January 2013):
 Why should you tell him anything private about your sex life anyway ? Isn't he an ex ? Why should you care to give him the right impression, or the wrong impression, or any particular impression about you NOW ?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2013): Don't even tell him you lost your virginity to him, because if he couldn't get inside you then chances are nothing is broken down there and you're a still a virgin now.
What is so shameful about being a virgin between 18-21 anyway? You're better off to keep it for as long as possible and lose it at the right time to the right person. I think you should have just told him. Not many guys would think bad of their girlfriend for not having lost her virginity yet. In your situation, there's more shame in telling a lie than there is telling the truth. Ask anyone on DC and they will tell you the same, there's no shame in being a virgin.
Would now be the right time to tell him?
Well that depends now if you and him are likely to get back together, or if this is a permanent break up.
I don't know the actual reason you split up, but If you DO decide to give things another go, before you make it official again, I think you should get rid of any dishonesty you have so you start a fresh with a clear conscience... That's my opinion.
Good luck.
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