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I lied a long time ago to her, she forgave me but now, she can't let it go. What can I do?

Tagged as: Dating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (18 May 2007) 2 Answers - (Newest, 19 May 2007)
A male United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

we were together for about 3 years, ups and downs of course. at the beginning of our relationship (about 2 1/2 years ago) i made a very bad mistake by lying 2 her about a situation. the situation was i had another woman in my room and she caught me after i kept lying to her about it. well, she said she forgave me and that we would put it behind us. since then we have been through a lot together even had a child who is now a year old. yesterday she brings up the subject again and she says she just wants to know the truth so she could have closure and put it behind her. so i tell her nothing happened and she gets angry at me calls me a liar and says she wants nothing 2 do with me.i assured her that it was years ago and that im not like that anymore and leave the past in the past. i apologized and pleaded with her to forgive me and we can start over and get married. she says she hates me and that i'm dead to her. i cried like a baby back bitch. i love her and i dont want to lose her over something so ancient. what can i do to get her to forgive me and take me back.

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A male reader, DV1 United States +, writes (19 May 2007):

DV1 agony auntBe flat out honest with her about the entire situation. Tell her that saying that she accepts your apology, and actually accepting it are two different things. If she can't move on from it, you've got a problem, and maybe you need to split. If she can, then you need to make it right. You have hurt her, and the best thing that you can do is try to be the best partner that you can be from here on out. You need to realize right off the bat- it's going to take seemingly forever for her to regain your trust. If you really love her, you'll be patient, and to your best to stay in her line of trust.

Good luck,

Dv1

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2007):

seems she cant get over what you did and to make things worse,she may have post natal depression,but it does seem from what she has said "that your dead" she dont want you in her life

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